Krumpus Review

     Let me just say first of all that this movie has a great idea: a Christmas horror film. But how scary can it get when its only rated PG 13? It has a lot of restrictions on what it can and can't do. Needless to say there's nothing scary or gory about this movie and its a big letdown. Here, I'll explain why you shouldn't go see your movie, because you'd be wasting your money and you'll be very dissapointed.
     First off, this movie has a terribad (yes I said terribad, its so bad it's a thousand times bad) plot. It literally starts out like a great story with a dysfunctional family at Christmas arguing and carrying on. Then at some in the movie you realize that this isn't going anywhere. Then Krumpus shows up in a winter snowstorm and starts fucking shit up. He steals the kids, wrecks cars, and messes up their house. Krumpus isn't actually the big baddie in the movie, it's actually his crew that fucks shit up the most. There was this clown-like guy that had a mouth like the alien from Aliens, a bunch of elves (they called them that, but they were more like short gnomes to me), and a group of murdering computer generated gingerbread men. Once the kid who seems a little slow is stolen from the house and gone up through the chimney I had lost all interest in this movie and realized it was stupid. Because I knew eventually everyone was going to get murdered somehow, although this movie is so cheesy you don't actually see anyone getting hurt or any blood or anything. Instead they get grabbed through snow and things like that. They kept it PG 13 for the kids, but if this movie has the limits of an R rated film it could have been something great. They could have taken things for a darker scare, or at the very least shown some gore.
     The only thing that I can say that was good about this film was the way that Krumpus actually looked. He looked way cool. He sort of looked like an old man and he had these great hoofs. He was pretty tall and he seemed to have a generally cool attitude. What I can say is that next time my friends want to go to the movies I should have more of a say so we don't end up seeing crap. A much better movie we could've seen is the last Hunger Games movie, that would've been a thousand times better than Krumpus. The special effects in the movie were alright but other than the hoofs and the way Krumpus looked it was nothing special. The real story of Krumpus is more interesting than this movie. And also, the story of Krumpus from American Dad is also much better than this movie, and its a lot funnier too.
     Also, this movie has a lame ending. At the end when everyone gets killed and the kid is alone with Krumpus he wakes up and realizes it was all just a dream. Then, when he gets his Christmas gifts he gets this ornaments from Krumpus (from the dream), and then it fades out and shows us that Krumpus is watching his family sitting down at Christmas. Not too cool.
     Anyways, enough about Krumpus. If I had to rate this movie, I'd say 4 out of 10 because it doesn't really go anywhere and it doesn't hold your attention long enough to mean anything to you. When the characters get taken or messed with, I don't feel anything for them because I don't care for these characters, they're kind of just an asshole family that can't get along so who cares. This movie could've been truly horrific if they had just pushed the rating to R. Instead we get a kiddy safe Christmas horror flick. Okay for the kiddies. Terrible for us adults.