June Five, Minds Alive: Explorations in the Intellect's Dive

Good evening ladies and gents, 

Just wanted to write, about anything here. 

First, what I've been up to lately. I've been working a lot at the retail grocery job but I'm also producing a lot of ai generated art featured on my Instagram, which can be seen here. In addition, I'm reading a lot. Right now I'm reading through George Eliot's Middlemarch. I'm also still practicing instruments, mostly guitar and piano. It's all time consuming. Plus sometimes I go out to the bar after work and chill with people there. In between I try to stay updated on what's happening in the news and whatnot. 

Next, Middlemarch is a very dry book. It's fiction but its so dry its almost like reading Gibbon's History of the Rise and Decline of the Roman Empire, which I happen to also be reading, but on my phone when I'm on work breaks, traveling on the bus, or laying down before bed. In those moments I finished Gibbon's volume 1 of the series. Fascinating material. I mentioned the Gibbon book to a customer the other day and he said, 'yeah, but did Gibbon write about how the Romans debased the currency?' I thought it was a minor thing to mention considering all the other stuff they did, but yeah, I sort of felt like the guy said that because he's trying to somehow form and correlate a modern day theory that we're like the Romans because the government has, in its own various methods, sort of debased our American currency. It was an interesting comment for him to focus on, or so I may think. 

However, Middlemarch is much more dry than the Gibbon because fiction isn't supposed to be so dry, it's supposed to be lifelike, literally coming to life off the page, that's what people go to fiction for, its infinite mana, its endless creativity, that drives us to keep turning the pages. What can I say about George Eliot? She writes about well off British people in the country, their marriages, their relationships, their struggles and contradictions with everything including their own personalities and shortcomings. Eliot is so brilliant that she even writes about upcoming technology, factories, and agriculture within the book, which takes place in 1829. In a sense, I think Eliot is almost too brilliant to become a beloved favorite writer or author, rather it is her authority as a voice and her brilliant observations that command respect even if most people will never read the entirety of Middlemarch unless they're a English Graduate student. 

Next, work has been grueling. Working at the grocery store has its ups and downs, and interactions with customers can sometimes be less-than-pleasant, and even with your managers. The late night rush lasts a very long time till midnight sometimes. The customers are impatient and angry and are always willing and ready to start fights beginning with name calling and yelling and sometimes escalating beyond that if they feel so inclined. And boy do they steal. They expect quick service and when they don't get it they sometimes rage. There's a lot of disrespect from customers and managers alike. One common thing I notice is sometimes when customers are in the regular checkout lines they're being rung up, they're ignoring the cashier and they're on their phone yapping. 

In addition, there's the emotional labor within the job. The job is grueling and there's few people that are actually cool with you while you're there. Some of the closest associates and managers I've worked with for years I'm not really cool with them and in fact I think they're shirkers hiding trying to get out of work most of all the time. I usually ignore them and just do what I want. When managers are pretty dumb and not really taking care of business, you find that them doing that allows you to pretty much do what you want, albeit with some caution. 

Remember, most people, including your managers are too dumb and lazy to really pay too much attention, make the most of it. After working in this business for 12 years, you learn that most managers are fake and manipulative so you have to learn how to fake them out in order to do what you want. I had a friend who became a manager and he became another one of those managerial drones that hates his job, maybe his life, maybe himself, but boy does he love being a manager. They ain't reading Middlemarch I'll tell ya that. Another tip for working grueling jobs like this is that if everybody's having a bad day and the work is going to utter shite, and they're all bitching to you, remember you're still having a better day than everybody else so act like it. Act better, be better.

Moving on, the news has been pretty much what I thought it would be. There's really no new news, just more of the same, on a loop, on a 24/7 timescale. I don't care if you're a democrat or a republican, the media and the government has you believing that we're all divided, 'us versus them,' gay versus straight, abortion vs the family, rich versus poor, white versus brown, worker versus ceo, democrat versus republican, this versus that.' I sincerely believe that this is what the government, the media, TV. movies, music, this is what I think they're saying at this impressionable time period in American democracy. 

Just think about the fact that you probably don't even know about BarbenHeimer unless you are a person of a certain kind of persuasion, a certain kind of class, a certain kind of taste. Kind of a random thing to mention but I want to hate on BarbenHeimer because I think it caught the zeitgeist at an important moment in American history what with so much going on with politics. The average American probably saw Barbenheimer but what about the people that didn't? Are they not as American as the rest of them? It's an odd but important question I think for an important reason. Who are the other people? 

Lastly, to wrap things up, we're living in a timescale where pretty much the only way to be safe from most harm in the world, is to have money. Either be born rich, get rich, or work your whole life till you accumulate enough of it because the way the world is going now, the world is turning itself into a money empire, money is the only thing that is important. I think, at this current juncture. I have my hippie element at times, because I'm a musician, but most people would agree with me, that money has pretty much taken over as the most important value of a thing in this world. It's bleak, man. 

Here's a story about money. I have a friend who's rooming with an old friend of ours for $1,000/month but he doesn't want to be there, and he wants to get out, but he can't go back to his parents out of fear or shame, and he can't afford to live on his own, and he prefers not have roommates so he's rooming with our old friend and its not going good. These are the real modern day American problems that the media doesn't talk about. My good pal is stuck with this other guy, supposedly a pal, but he's really an asshole and my guy wants out but he's stuck because the American economic system is setup so that you can't really move out of your parents place unless you have a very good salary at a good job with 40 hours plus benefits or more. That's the reality the media doesn't talk about, instead they usually just force-feed the 'us vs them,' slogan repeatedly. Of course, most conservatives would say my friend isn't doing enough to help himself and that he might need two or three jobs, but at that point, even if he did get his own place, that would be putting an even higher price on life, wouldn't it? 

In conclusion, time to wake up. Only caring about yourself will only get you so far, usually in an organization, but in real life, outside the workplace you have to learn to think smarter and harder about how you can improve the world around you, and think for yourself, rather than listening to the media, your parents, your boss, your friends, your acquaintances. You have to learn to think more about how to correctly justify the differences between right and wrong, and the moral grey. I'm telling you right now, most people don't know how to do this, even some people I know in their 40s and 50s, who you would think would have become smarter by now but it's already too late for them. They've been indoctrinated into their systems of belief, usually the wrong system, you can tell because they're still fucking up even if you don't know or hear about it too often. They're fucking up in the shadows, lol. 

ps, covid might make a comeback this summer in LA

April Fools

Good evening,

It's good to see you. I'd like to jot down some notes. 

First, once the holiday months passed, work became a lot slower. Typically in retail grocery this happens every year. Business picks up again in spring and summer. The holiday period was so intense this year that I'm glad to see less hours across the board. That doesn't sit well with the other employees though, who are counting on 40+ hours every week to make ends meet. But once April comes around the bend everybody will be working a lot more again and making more money. 

Second, the most exciting thing that has happened is the developments around A.I. I've been especially into A.I. art. I started doing A.I. art the first month the art generators came out and I've really taken to it. I've tried all the best ones but the one I've taken to the most is Stable Diffusion 2.1 version, using BlueWillow on Discord and Magespace. I would like to use more Midjourney and Dall E2 but those cost $10/month. 

With Stable Diffusion I can practice a lot of prompts to keep tweaking my art styles without paying money. I don't know if there's a path along the road where I can change my knowledge into money, but for now it's been a big thing for me because it's something I can do solo and its using new, cutting-edge technology. 

One of the best things ever about doing A.I. art is that I learned that I have a good eye, I can tell good art when I see it. On top of that, the prompts work by text, so depending on how much you know, or potentially could know, you can create almost anything, endlessly.

Check out some of my A.I. artwork on Instagram, https://www.instagram.com/jazzerrocker779/.

Third, I've kept up with a lot of reading. Tonight I did a lot of reading reading the news. The big story is that Trump has finally been indicted. 

I've read seven books so far this year: Will and Ariel Durant's Rosseau and Revolution [history], Will and Ariel Durant's The Age of Voltaire [history], Anna LindenWaller's A Memory Called Empire [scifi], Anna LindenWaller's A Desolation Called Peace [scifi], Babel by R.F. Kuang [steampunk], Rite of Passage by Alexi Panshin [scifi], and Tales From A Thousand and One Nights by N.J. Dawood [canon]. 

I've also still been practicing reading in Spanish and occasionally Italian and French when I have the time. One of my goals for the year is to read the Complete Works of William Shakespeare. I bought a copy at a library book sale for a dollar and it's a handsome hardcover edition.

Life seems to have slowed down for me in many respects. Most of my friends have moved far away, driven by what they think will be more happiness if they go somewhere else. Others we've simply broken up and went our separate ways because of personal problems between us or their lives just simply fell apart. 

Even though some of my friends were extremely toxic when we spent too much time together I still feel for them and hope they go on to greener pastures. But I only know too well that just by moving from one situation to another, it does not simply make all the bad stuff go away. In fact, through my own experience I've learned that it's mostly worse when you think you can run from your problems and think things will be better. Out of the frying pan, into the fire, as they say. 

That being said, I wish them all the best. But the reality of the matter is that life is tough, for all of us, and we can't run from our problems, and magically everything will be better. This isn't anime or video games or Hulu TV. 

I've tried to make the most out of my new lack of a social life by reading more, getting more rest, continuing to play and practice instruments, working on ai art, and music, using chatbots for ai art prompts, writing more, being more creative. As time goes on, I realize more and more that I have to be a creative and keep creating. 

image ai generated 

Retail Report January 2023

Good Evening, 

How is life treating you? In this crazy, topsy, turvy world one can sometimes not tell. Here I'd like to jot down some notes of what retail grocery has been like so far, this being the end of the first month of 2023. 

First, business is booming but inflation has hit our store shelves harder than ever. These are the most egregious prices for food that I have ever seen in my entire life. Many customers complain about the prices all day long and honestly, I can't blame them. We are, at this moment, selling a carton of eggs for $9.99. Meat prices are also very high. Most people stock up on the cheap stuff: grains, noodles, junk food like chips and soda, beer and wine. I don't think Americans are eating very well. And on top of that, a lot of them are beginning to become obese. Only in America. 

Second, this is sort of minor but it's little things like this that get ignored that eventually grow into bigger issues getting ignored. The store's front door that opens and closes electronically when customers walk through has been broken for the last ten days. Meaning it won't open/close electronically anymore, therefore, the store manager has decided to leave the front door open at all times. Now, this isn't too big of an issue if you're a customer going for a quick beer run but for us employees this has become a big issue in the middle of winter, where cold windy air blasts are hitting you while on the checkstand, some nights its been like 47 degrees. You can justify the fact that the door's been like that for ten days anyway you want, but I see it for what it is, cutting costs at the employees' expense. Brrrrrrrrr! 

Also, on top of that there's always the covid issue. Most management and both upper management have not been wearing facemasks since the beginning. This set a bad precedent for all the employees, so that when covid hit our store hard, many employees simply didn't even come back and we lost a lot of workers. At one point there was some 32 employees sick with covid. I was surprised but at the time the vaccine was out so I felt safer, especially with mask wearing. 

In addition, another bad precedent that the upper management set was that they decided very early to remove the plastic barriers guarding between the cashiers and the customers, both inside the checkout lanes and on the side self-checkout lanes. This is especially bad because covid isn't over and most customers don't wear facemasks, meaning they could easily spread particulates into the air by talking loudly. Although we have vaccines there are some employees and managers that don't have the vaccine, and have been infected with covid several times over, making the store still a potential place to catch covid.   

Third, business is booming and the lines are never ending, leading to tiring, long work days. Despite high inflation prices, the work is still intense and nonstop. I would say the work became much more intense since covid 2020, and has stayed that way ever since. As a cashier who mostly works self-checkout most shifts, I would say the work is at its most intense, since I've started back in 2013, shockingly. Although the work is easy and self-explanatory in most cases, overall, when you consider how many customers I'm going through and helping individually, it's a nonstop never-ending rollercoaster. 

In fact, I've had to take more time to rest and sleep longer during the day to deal with it. All my shifts are usually 330pm-12am shifts so working late all day and staying up half the night doesn't help. I'm getting older, but getting older doesn't hit you this fast. A part of it is the fact that the work I'm doing is intense, nonstop, and very fast. Most of the day you don't get time to think, reflect, or have time to think of things to say to people, including the people you're helping in the moment in real time. You learn to sort of grunt or say stock phrases and just press buttons, thus making the job more manageable. Life in big city.

Lastly, the good thing about my retail grocery gig is that I'm full time, I'm in the Union, and I've created a work persona that's somewhat popular over there. I mostly just get brownie points for being an agreeable guy and helping customers but I've become so good at it and so well known, that even my management and upper management commend me for it, whereas in the past, that wasn't always the case. Sometimes it takes a while to win over your bosses. But it is my capacity for happiness that is carrying me through what is an obviously grueling job day in and day out. 

Sometimes I think about doing other things: going back to college, getting a degree, doing something with it, going to trade school, doing something with a trade, or working harder on music and a band and touring, or just writing like I am now, only writing books and selling them. There's a myriad of things I could do, or not do, but none of that changes my degree of happiness or capacity for happiness. Surprisingly, I'm happy doing what I'm doing now. I sort of see that the work has become a one-note samba, but I won't let that discourage me from my path. The only path I see right now, is the path moving forward, into tomorrow. 

image ai generated 

111 Day 2023, Happy New Year!

Good evening ladies and gentlemen, 

Happy new year! Today is 111 day, it's January 11th, the first month of the year, on the 11th day, 111 day. What a nice number. I hope you have been well. Have you? Is everything alright?

Things are spectacular right now. I'm on day 3 of my vacation week. This is a quiet vacation. I'm not going to travel anywhere or do anything too fancy. I just wanted time off from my busy retail gig. The store has been busy since the pandemic began in 2020. I requested this week long vacation every month since September 2022 and have been denied every month. That is, until now. 

The vacation has been fruitful and relaxing. I have been reading a lot, practicing drums everyday, creating a lot of AI art, and eating out at my favorite restaurants. But contrary to most vacationers I haven't been overeating, rather I feel like I've been eating less, which has been better for the body. Refreshing and rejuvenating.  

First, I spent the first two days reading The Age of Voltaire by the historian Will Durant. It's an analysis of England and France before and around the time of the French revolution. Amazing historical detail. And I've learned a lot more about Voltaire, who although was trained by the Jesuits, was a sore wound in the side of Christianity and he was often persecuted for his views against the Church and the nobles as well as other intellectuals. 

I nearly finished the book but decided to take a break because my dad recommended this new space opera that came out back in 2019. It's called A Memory Called Empire by Arkady Martine. It's a homage to early Ursula K Leguin but it has a vibe very similar to Cecelia Holland's Floating Worlds, a 1970s space opera. It has all those space opera bells and whistles but it's also got a cultural and linguistics thing going for it as well. Some of the naming systems are middle eastern and the cultures within the book are Japanese and Chinese. It's quite good and I'd recommend it to any science fiction fans or anyone who's interested in reading a good space opera, a brand new one rather than the old classics. 

Second, I've also been practicing drums with my new hi-hat cymbal. Tomorrow I've got a jam session with my friend who plays a Selmer alto saxophone. So tomorrow I'll use my makeshift 4-piece drum set, which includes a kibaga practice snare pad, a pearl limited edition snare, a meinL cymbal, and a ziljin hi-hat. I would have a bass drum and a tom, but space is limited here at the moment so I have to play with what I have.

Third, I've been creating a lot of ai art. You can view my work here https://www.instagram.com/jazzerrocker779/. I've created a lot of my AI generated art using www.mage.space, a wonderful tool that recently came out with a payment model because so many people were using it and enjoying it. I've found that with AI I've been able to find out that I have an eye for art, the eye of an artist. 

Furthermore, I had no idea that I had an eye for art until I was recommended to read Vasari's Lives, The Illustrated Lives of the Italian Painters of the Renaissance, I was recommended the book by my friend's wife, Elizabeth. From there I looked at and studied all the Italian Renaissance art I could and then after that my dad saw that I seemed interested in art, so he recommended that I start using mage.space to create AI art. From two older people with more knowledge I was able to find these things out and the rest is history. Now I do AI art often and I have over 5,000 images [gasp!]. 

Lastly, what does life feel like now, and furthermore, going forward? Even though there are cyclones over Los Angeles and 90% of the state is in fear of flooding I feel great. I'm happy now because I'm on vacation and doing all the things I love with unlimited free time but in four days I'm back at work and it will be tough. How does one stay happy? 

"There is no definitive answer to what makes humans happy, as it can vary greatly from person to person. However, some things that are commonly associated with happiness include having strong and supportive relationships, feeling fulfilled by one's work or hobbies, having financial security, having good physical and mental health, and feeling a sense of purpose or meaning in one's life. Additionally, people can also experience pleasure and enjoyment through different types of activities, such as exercising, traveling, or listening to music.

It's important to note that there are also other factors that play into happiness, such as genetics, which can account for up to 50% of the variance in happiness levels among people, and daily activities and practices can also have a positive impact.

Therapy and meditation, positive thinking, and gratitude are also known to be beneficial for one's well-being and may help some people increase their happiness levels." [openchatGPT]

"Beneath cherry blossoms pink and white, I find happiness in simple sights. A gentle breeze, a babbling stream, The rustling leaves, a peaceful gleam.

With every step upon the path, I feel my spirit start to lift. And though the road may have its twists, I know that joy and peace exist.

As petals fall and dance around, I'm filled with beauty that astounds. And in the sunshine and the rain, I find my heart is free again.

So let us all take life in stride, And let our hearts be open wide. For in the end, it's not the end, But the simple joys that make us blend.

With the world and all its wonder, Happiness will always be under our feet, a constant companion, guiding us to a brighter horizon." [openchatGPT]

image ai generated

2022's Grand Exit, Happiness

Hello Readers, 

It's the end of the year. Wow! What a year it has been. Let's go over things I did and worked on this year, changes in the work place that occurred, and some thoughts on happiness and wellbeing. 

First, things I did. I worked a lot. I was promoted to full time cashier, got increased pay plus hours, so that's been a big change for me. For years I was only part time which meant I had a lot of discretionary free time to do whatever I wanted. Not so much these days. I work forty+ hours each week. Not only that, but the job has become more demanding in some respects because what with covid not going away, it has been nonstop busy even when the holidays aren't around. 

Second, I worked on a lot of language learning. I've been learning a lot of languages ever since 2020 but I've become fairly proficient in Spanish, but I also know a lot of French, Italian, German, and a little Portuguese. These are the languages of the Hanseatic League, merchant guilds from central and northern Europe, going back to the 1400s. I'm the best at Spanish and French as my mother spoke some French and Creole around the house when I was a boy, and co-workers speak Spanish nonstop all day at work, so those two are fairly easy for me to pickup as I have heard it often. 

My accents became better when I combined learning words from reading in the languages on Kindle, then practicing with audiobooks in those languages. It was a combination of both. I would say its easy to start learning but difficult to keep up your motivation and go beyond basic phrases. At this point, I can understand Spanish well, and the rest decently, although I can probably read all of them better than I can speak them. It's been an engaging endeavor and I look forward to learning more in the future. It's an ongoing enterprise. 

Third, I've learned drums and piano. I started learning drums in August and I've become good. I can play rock and jazz styles primarily. On piano, I focus more on a jazz style, with lots of chromatic chord changes, a la McCoy Tyner. I even learned how to play a bamboo flute. There's always new things with music but sometimes I get in these lulls where I'm not playing live very often and not doing jam sessions at the house, so I stay engaged by learning new instruments. That being said, I've spent too many months at different instruments and will focus this year on guitar. At heart, I'm a guitar player. 

Alongside music and writing, my other creative pursuit has been AI art. You can see my best works here https://www.instagram.com/jazzerrocker779/. I've had a lot of friends, acquaintances, co-workers, and more give me a lot of crap for using AI to create art. But the fact of the matter is that real artists are already using it, selling art with it, and making money.

The best AI art generator is called the DALL E 2, which uses openai.com's source code. You can buy from openai.com a low resolution image of your own creation for 8 cents, a better one for 16 cents, and an even better one for 18 cents. For that low cost even I could buy images if I knew I could make a return in my investments by selling them to others. Some artists are doing just that. 

The openai team that created DALL E 2 just released openchatGPT, which is a huge gamechanger in the world of AI. I'll be using it in this blog.  

I've been using a free AI art generator made by two guys who are using the Stable Diffusion AI art generator source code, it's called mage, you can find the art generator at www.mage.space. It's been so satisfying that I nearly quit playing video games to focus on reading books, music, and using mage to create art. My favorite thing about mage is that I don't have to actually have any art skills, I only need ideas. It works by having the user type in any words or numbers and it generates images based off that. Although I can't draw, I know the western canon, art history, and the Italian Art Renaissance period. So I can still can get great results. Take a look on my Instagram. 

Fourth, a lot of things happened this year. In particular a lot changed in the world of retail grocery, my job. 

"The retail grocery industry saw significant changes and disruptions in 2022 due to the ongoing COVID-19 pandemic. Some of the major developments in the industry include the following:

1. Shift to online grocery shopping: The pandemic led to a significant increase in online grocery shopping as people tried to reduce their exposure to the virus by avoiding physical stores. Many grocery stores and retailers introduced or expanded their online ordering and delivery services to meet this demand.

2. Changes in shopping patterns: The pandemic also led to changes in shopping patterns, with people stockpiling certain items and shifting towards buying more pantry staples and frozen foods. This led to disruptions in supply chains and product availability.

3. Increase in demand for home delivery: The pandemic also led to an increase in demand for home delivery of groceries as people tried to minimize their in-store shopping trips. This led to an increase in the use of delivery services such as Instacart and Shipt, as well as the expansion of home delivery services by grocery chains.

4. Changes in store operations: In response to the pandemic, many grocery stores implemented changes to their store operations, including increased cleaning and sanitation measures, limits on the number of customers allowed in stores at a given time, and the use of face masks and other personal protective equipment by employees.

5. Impact on small and local businesses: The pandemic also had a significant impact on small and local grocery stores, which faced challenges in adapting to the changing market conditions and competing with larger chains that had more resources to invest in online and delivery services. Many small and local stores had to rely on community support to stay in business." [openchatGPT]

Lastly, although I've spent a lot of time logged in at work, I've also spent a lot of time thinking, learning, pontificating on the future. I've learned that I'm still happy despite losing friends, work getting tougher, people being more rude, and pay only barely improving. Of course, it helps to be the child who has his own. And not only that, but sometimes I'm the child who plays the Shakespearean Old Fool. And not only that but I also play the Voltaire Satirist Philosopher at Check Stand 9. All the worlds' stage. Life in its rich tapestry. 

What will happiness be like in the future?

"It is difficult to predict what happiness will be like in the future, as it is influenced by many complex and dynamic factors, including societal and cultural changes, technological advances, economic conditions, and personal experiences and circumstances.

Happiness is a subjective and personal experience, and what brings happiness to one person may not necessarily bring happiness to another. Some people find happiness in material possessions, while others find it in relationships, personal achievements, or meaningful experiences.

In the future, it is possible that advances in technology and medicine could lead to improvements in physical and mental health, which may contribute to greater overall happiness and well-being. However, these advancements could also bring about new challenges and concerns that may impact happiness in different ways.

Ultimately, happiness is a complex and multifaceted experience that is influenced by a wide range of factors, and it is difficult to predict how it will evolve in the future."

"Happiness is a state of mind, with joy that we find." [openchatGPT]

image ai generated

Christmas 2022

Good evening ladies and gentlemen, 

Merry Christmas! This year has been busy on the job but I've surprisingly been able to make time for a lot of reading, practicing different instruments, as well as writing.

Christmas is that special time of year. Why? 

"Christmas is a holiday that is celebrated by many people around the world, and it holds great significance for many people. Here are a few reasons why Christmas is so important:

1. Christmas is a time of love and generosity: Christmas is a time when people come together to celebrate the love and generosity that exists in the world. It is a time to give gifts to loved ones, to spend time with family and friends, and to show appreciation for the people in our lives.

2. Christmas celebrates the birth of Jesus: For many people, Christmas is a time to celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ, who is considered by Christians to be the son of God. The birth of Jesus is seen as a miraculous event, and the holiday is a way to remember and honor his life and teachings.

3. Christmas brings people together: Christmas is a time when people from all walks of life come together to celebrate. It is a time when people put aside their differences and focus on the things that bring them joy and happiness.

4. Christmas is a time of tradition: Many people have long-standing traditions that they participate in during the holiday season. These traditions help to create a sense of community and bring people together.

Overall, Christmas is a special time of year that is important for many people around the world. It is a time to celebrate love, generosity, and the birth of Jesus, and it is a time to come together and create lasting memories with loved ones." [openchatGPT]

I've been somehow able to have a great time this year despite working nonstop with no vacation. You see, it all starts with the individual. I'm happy despite working all the time because I have the capacity for happiness. I've created time outside of work to create a persona, the persona of an artist, that is what I've done.

I've started doing a lot of AI art, ever since the AI art generators came out two months ago. I've even started using openchatGPT here in this blog post, practicing drums, piano, guitar, singing, writing blogs here and there, as well as reading a lot, the latest edition being historian Will Durant's Volume 2 of his Story of Civilization Series, The Life of Greece. So I seem to be awash in activity, but the activities give me a sense of who I am, and help with my capacity for happiness.

It seems that the older I get the more I realize you can't escape from pain in this world. But you can learn to be resilient and improve your capacity for happiness to live through it. Work seems more vital than ever, especially in California, where every man seems to have to prove his worth by having to earn more and more money, but I've also realized that work is essential to the intellectual artist outsider life as well.

"Work is important for many reasons. It provides individuals with a sense of purpose and meaning, as well as a sense of accomplishment. Work also allows people to contribute to society and make a positive impact on the world. In addition, work provides people with financial stability and the ability to provide for themselves and their families. Finally, work can also be a source of personal growth and development, as it allows individuals to learn new skills, gain experience, and expand their knowledge and understanding of the world." [openchatGPT]

On Christmas Eve I was joking around with a customer and he liked my sense of mirth on the holiday and he tipped me $100, not too shabby! This year the family and I ate lobster at a wonderful Chinese restaurant. If you need me, I'll be practicing drums and piano or reading more of the Will Durant series.

image ai generated

Holiday Retail 2022

Good evening ladies and gentlemen, 

It's been a while since I wrote one of these. Here I'd like to explain to you what it's been like working the retail gig this holiday season. 

First, the work has been intense and nonstop. I've been working 42-48 hour weeks since November and the work isn't letting up even going into this week and Christmas week. The good news is that the pay is decent but it's tough making it through the slog every shift. I've been working five days per week with only two days off since the summer. 

Second, cold/flu and covid season is here again, and with that brings sicknesses, mostly of a respiratory nature. For the first time since covid began in 2020, I finally got a regular cold. It only lasted a day or two but it was setback from my usual day to day routine. I still went to work as I felt well enough, but I probably initially got sick from work, from customers and/or employees. 

Third, my job has become easier but its still grueling. I've sort of graduated from having to do regular checkout scanning large orders. Rather, my management has decided they want me to run self-checkout for my eight hour shifts, as its mostly machine button pressing menu, and the older cashier employees who aren't used to computers don't want to do it at all. So I sort of lucked out. Because the older employees don't want to do it, I end up doing it, and I get to avoid doing all the heavy lifting $400-$600 holiday orders and bagging a million bags. Not too shabby! 

Fourth, the type of employees that get hired and stay on the job has diminished immensely. Right now, they want anyone they can because they need cashiers. So they hire them and immediately promote them to cashier. The problem is that none of them stay. There are two other young people my age, two girls, who are very good cashiers but all of the other young people are baggers or other positions that work menial side jobs in other departments. A lot of them are special needs and the regular ones seem to have a lot of behavioral issues. I've had to learn how to talk to these kids in a certain type of way to get them on my side and help me out. Not ideal to getting the job done everyday! 

Fifth, management seems to be good this year at getting the job done. But they have done a horrible job in encouraging mask wearing so oftentimes the youth get sick easily and spread it around so that's concerning. My main problem with the management is that since day one in 2020 they weren't enforcing mask wearing either by customers or employees. That has been a problem since the early days of covid. The actual boss and co-director never wear masks and have had covid already several times. They probably spread it. One of the sales managers has had covid several times as well. I keep my mask on and keep my distance from all of them for my own safety. They all have failed horribly on this one simple task. 

Lastly, the job has become more machine-like. You really get a sense that you're a cog in the machine in there nowadays. The upper management lack empathy, but you also see it at the lower management level as well as from the customers, that that's expected from customers at this point in the game. You have to really dig deep to see empathy and compassion from others there nowadays, but it is still there in small doses here and there. It's not the worst place in the world, but you can sort of see that one day this entire operation, this job will eventually become obsolete if replaced by machines. The self-checkout tells me that everyday. 

All that being said, my personal life is quite magisterial. I learned how to play piano, sing better, and drums. I can speak Spanish pretty well now, as well as a little French, Italian, German, and even Portuguese. I'm still reading the western canon and loving every minute of it. C'est la vie. 

Happy Holidays!

image ai generated 

das Erntedankfest 2022

Hello loyal blogspot readers, 

How are you? It's been a minute. Things have been up, down, topsy, turvy. Here I'd like to jot down some notes on what life has been like this Thanksgiving week. 

First, I've been working nonstop since the summer. I've requested a week off for a vacation week every month since September and I've been denied every time. C'est la vie. On top of that, I only had Tuesday off this week so I'm working hardcore. 

Here's an empathetic experience for you. I was listening to classical music on my last ten minute break tonight and this cute girl I work with came in and talked on her phone for like two minutes, probably with her boyfriend. Then she just sat there and cried. It was super awkward. I didn't know what to say so I didn't say anything. But I was listening to a great classical piece without headphones so she heard it, and it seemed to soothe her, especially the last major chord ending the piece. Quite an experience. Did I mention she's cute?

Second, although my job is grueling, it is pretty easy. So although I get mad when I'm there sometimes, in reality, I can't complain too much. Pushing carts in the cold is harder work and I've done that too. I stand there and take cash and throw things in the bag. It helps to have a personality but the job doesn't require you to have any kind of personality whatsoever, so if you don't really want to talk, you can just say the bare minimum. 

Third, this holiday season has been especially rough on the low level employees and the customers. The only way you can really enjoy this holiday season and have a lot of fun is if you're some kind of superman or superwoman. Most people that come to my line have nothing but complaints about this, that, the other, or prices of most things. I could care less. Nobody seems to be happy and you know what, that's not going to change. You know why? Because they simply lack the capacity for happiness. 

Fourth, what is the capacity for happiness? The capacity for happiness is the ability to find happiness within yourself, in and outside of your own makeup and psyche, and being able to see it and fulfill it within others. When you are happy, you are smiling, even if not physically, your spirit will be shining bright, and when others see that, theirs will be too, ad infinitum. 

But again, not to be rude, but most people can never be completely happy because most people simply lack the capacity for happiness. Nobody in the universe, not even God, or Christ Himself, can make you happy. You have to make the leap on your own for your own good. Everybody wants to go to heaven but nobody wants to die. It easier to smoke pot or get drunk or do hard drugs. 

Lastly, I've been talking about this idea for years on this blog. Here's a blog from 2020 even entitled Capacity for Happiness, you can read it here. When everything is going well, it doesn't really matter if your happy or sad or in the middle or whatever. But it's times like these, where the world seems to be falling off the hidden cliffs of the abyss, staring back at you, that's when you need to have practiced and gained the capacity for happiness, training within it and without it, your entire life, ad infinitum.

image ai generated 

FTO Trio

Gute Abend, 

I got my friend Feather, a death metal drummer to come over and play my snare and cymbal drum with brushes for a jam session. And Jason Tomas, a wonderful, amazing saxophone player played with us, with myself on seven-string guitar. This is the results. 

If you like what you hear here, check out my youtube channel, where you can hear Jason and myself do a lot of straight ahead jazz as a saxophone guitar duet. 

Thank for listening and keep on rocking in the free world. 

[recordings listed in order performed, two improvisations and standards include autumn leaves and blue monk, recorded on android phone with soundcorset app, a free application]

https://soundcorset.com/r/loxu0bkA6x?fbclid=IwAR19ncfwUhAPRHhJhzF5JcXgzhBzFiF0j0CostYR8uDkoASJSLle2B7YeXA [fto trio abend blues]

https://soundcorset.com/r/sTe3vZfK4B?fbclid=IwAR0FlAGsRgq6ZpqK8MDu3yD2aMdj-mJUM7BlMB-efe1QWhj6-HW8hZHxJ2E [fto trio autumn leaves]

https://soundcorset.com/r/8ag85zyfBx?fbclid=IwAR2k7I5_Ps5i6WHw4DcySuFgvXDgCzlA3kJbwlIUmKdYABfOApiLd6Yy9NQ [fto trio blue monk]

https://soundcorset.com/r/82j2b4mJRp?fbclid=IwAR1bMo9lp2VPPyMAjuWl29KtbzLb2pVUPfqBF9OUHw7dpAtrdZ0h0GkwqVQ [fto trio schlaf gut]

https://soundcorset.com/r/CFSBQa8QrM?fbclid=IwAR1LB3ilFAtkYma1p81PJrWA5fYhjhv3h0-rU1AaL39uJhu7AdzjhWite7A [Drum Solo No.13]

image ai generated 

verändert sich durch Sein und Zeit

Gute Abend, 

Things are changing so much and so rapidly it's almost as if time itself is a blur. In the blink of an eye, we are born, we grow, we live, and we die. 

Mortality and fate are intertwined, although the moderns have never been able to quite explain or understand it no matter how far they get in doing so. The Ancients had an easier way of trying to understand it, but they too failed in this fundamentally human question. 

I've lived in Los Angeles for ten years, have had a great life, made some friends, partied and chilled with a lot of people, became a better musician, and even became a part of these rock and roll after hours parties by playing Hendrix for drunkards and druggies. 

Life is good. But fundamentally I realize I'm right back where I started when I first got here. Trying to make it in Los Angeles through music, my own wits, and whatever talents I may have in any other areas. It's rough. It's rough for anybody out here. 

The pandemic made life for a lot of people much worse. Their children have become stay-at-home malcontents that can't handle working, or worse, they just do drugs and alcohol and have no hope of ever succeeding in life, let alone holding onto a job without switching every 2-4 years. 

There are new strains of corona out there and there's more of the threat of respiratory diseases for infants and young children. Politics have become embroiled and republicans are content to make fun of Pelosi's husband pretty much getting murdered. 

To be alive in the bitter sea. 

What's a guy to do?

Run the changes again. 

Play the same old song but in a different way. In order to live in this decline of western civilization, you must learn to find a new way to live. 

For everyone, this will mean something different. For me, I had to learn to stay away from problem people and their problems, and stay focused on my job, music, reading, eating better and losing weight, and maintaining, making, and improving relationships. None of it is easy. In fact, it' grueling and mind-numbing. 

For years and years I used to be content to sit in my room and play video games, not caring about anything going on outside my window. Then the pandemic kicked in and somehow I became more serious. I realized how fickle life can be. 

I started taking music more seriously, deeply trying to understand everything I read, rather than just reading for pleasure. I started learning languages like Spanish, French, Italian, German, and Portuguese. I learned how to play jazz guitar so I could get out of my rock guitar virtuoso lizard brain. I started playing piano and drums and even singing. I even did a lot of open mics where I was playing electric guitar plugged into a PA, and singing along to my guitar. Scary! 

Today, I took the bus to guitar center and bought a pair of drum brushes, brushes, used to play more mellow soulful jazz patterns and ballads, even swing.

So there you go. Find your way to live. The meaning of life is that it is meant to be lived. 

You got this. 

[photo is ai generated, created with stable diffusion, android playing jazz saxophone] 

Siegfried comes to save Los Angeles

Good evening ladies and gentlemen,

It's been a long time. Hello world. 

I've been okay. C'est la vie, as the French say. There's a lot going on in today's rapidly changing world. A lot of it is terrifying, especially for a 33 year old American male, but really, for anybody, the times they are a-change-in. 

We just came out of a terrible presidency by one of the worst people on the planet and Americans are still supporting him even to this day like he's God's gift to woman. America is becoming more and more totalitarian in every way, shape, and form, and believe me folks, its not just republicans who are Attila the Hun fans, it's democrats too. My work has cameras locked onto every cashier and in every aisle to make sure nobody steals anything. Sound familiar? 

On top of that there's record inflation, soaring gas prices, we can't afford rent, we can't afford groceries, our kids are continuously getting gunned down by madmen in schools, we can't afford children we already have, the climate has gone to the dogs, and the white people have decided to ban abortions but secretly allow their women to get abortion pills and stuff like that. Don't forget climate change. 

Covid isn't going away, and rather, is evolving faster than we can create vaccines for. The workforce doesn't quite know it yet, but they've been decimated by long covid and we don't know the full extent of the long term symptoms but one of them is being tired all the time and continuous brain fog. These victims can't even read a book, I'm afraid, they wouldn't have the attention span. On top of that, other countries are taking more control over the world and America has become a lesser. Trump made our country weak and Biden couldn't fix it. And now we're stuck. Interesting times. 

Companies are becoming less and less employee focused, even Union shops, and rather, instead, they've become more like sweat shops. Ironically, more like China. This has been happening since the American early days of the robber barons. 

Welcome to America, we're the gestapo now, and we support Atilla the Hun, and my name is Siegfried, I have blonde hair and blue eyes.

But seriously, what can one do with a mess like this one? 

There's nothing you really can do except vote Democrat for the Mid Terms. They're the lesser of the two evils, they at least attempt to do the right thing, although they're no angels either.

Part of the problem is that everybody is living in a separate world in this moment of time. Nobody reads the same news, nobody watches the same tv shows, nobody plays the same video games, nobody reads the same books, nobody can agree on anything, and most people aren't smart enough to take news, facts, and information and think for themselves, rather they believe what they hear and just naturally assume that's the way it is, that it is truth, that everything they see and hear is a fact. What happened to thinking for yourselves? 

I told my friends I take the bus in LA. They said, "Be careful! There's criminals on the bus who will rob you."

I said, "What criminals? Where? Did somebody rob you on the bus?"

They said, "No, but I just heard about it on the news."

Are they all really that scared? 

That's beside the point.

What we really need is a remote coalition government that isn't controlled by government, republicans, democrats, libertarians, socialists, communists, or our parents. We all need to come together to vote Democrat, a New Great Society, but only the true believers in the good are allowed in. Are you one of us? 

The end of the beginning. More work to be done tomorrow! 

Live Jazz! Guitar and Saxophone! 10/6/2022!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t0Km9rjsh8w&ab_channel=MegaFigueroa007

Featuring Jason Tomas on alto saxophone and Orlando Figueroa on guitar

Improv most of the set, and Blue Monk by Thelonious Monk

The Summer Drum

Summer's almost gone, you Doors fans, dang hippies!

The summer is almost over. And what a hot summer it was. Too hot. The planet is experiencing the worst global warming ever. But that's not the point of this blog. 

Today I went to guitar center to play some real live drums, a real drum set. The first week or so I've only had a practice drum pad, which was too expensive, 30 bucks! For wool. 

Okay, so I've been intimated by drums forever. 

In fact, when I first played drums the first day at guitar center I was so self conscious that when people came into the room I stopped the cymbals and silenced them with my hands like Bill Bruford LOL.

But you can learn to get confidence on a new instrument. I just started playing the best I could and somehow they were impressed. The guy even asked to hold my stick to see if there was magic in it. He tried it and he wasn't that good. 

Two weeks later I went back more determined but when I sat on the kit I was still self conscious and fearful. 

Then I remembered some rock song with a 16th note hi hat pattern, it was like a Zappa thing or something. Or like Deep Purple's Ian Pace. So I hit the 16th note pattern on the hi hat, then copied it across the entire kit, from the hi hat, to snare, to toms, to cymbals, and walaaaaaaaaaaah, polyrhythms are born! 

Then suddenly I was playing lighter and faster, and I was starting to get more jazzy. 

Just goes to show you that you need practice really to have the confidence. They go hand in hand. 

I don't have much time to practice, what with working 48 hours at the retail gig, but the time I do use, is spent with great listening and patience, that I sort of can copy things somehow. Must be all the practice from guitar. 

Get me a different drum for every different emotion, it's go time. This is like therapy lol. Cathartic.