7/10 On AI, AI Art, and the Culture

Good evening folks. I just wanted to jot down some thoughts I've been thinking about since the last post. 

    First, I think more and more people are becoming aware to the fact that AI isn't really as great as its been doing on the stock market. Sure, the American economy is betting a lot on AI and the fact that AI is going to save money and automate things so that workers will be able to do work that is more important, creative, and more meaningful. That's what the techno bro AI companies want you to think. But the reality is that the best thing we've done with AI is create chatbots that aren't really thinking or sentient, rather they spew out things they've been trained on, and they've mostly been trained on the internet. 

    Me personally, I've found a lot of fun and tinkered a lot with AI. In fact, I use AI at my job everyday to look up the prices or products and items that aren't always easily figured out by just regular google searches. The use of AI in a retail environment is great, but again, it's still in a limited position. 

    For years, I worked as a Self-Checkout Cashier Clerk, mostly using the crappy automated AI self-checkout machines, but the thing is, that those machines can only do so much, you have to actually interact with the customers yourself to really know what's going on. These things are limited and on top of that a lot of times late at nights when the store was busy, these self-checkout machines would freeze, automatically shutdown and not work, and it would take forever for them to get back running again. 

    Basically, these AIs aren't coming for your job, not quite yet. You really can't trust any type of AI with basically, anything important, serious, or critical. And yeah folks, that means you can't trust AI with most things that actually matter. I've personally found a lot of fun and utility in using AI to create images. I've been doing it for like two years and its been a blast but of course there's always the dilemma of 'you're doing AI art thats not real art, that's not art,' versus the people who don't know anything about art, and the artists in between who are smart enough to have already been utilizing AI art generators over the past 2-3 years. 

    Secondly, even if you can create stunning great AI art, there's always the issue, how can you get paid being an AI artist or utilizing AI in your handmade art? Well therein lies the rub. You can create AI art all day and be amazing at it but you will still have to work hard and put in the work in order to get paid and actually have a career making a money off your AI art. 

    Even regular artists have to put in a lot of hard labor in order to actually make a living off their art. So just because you can create good AI art doesn't mean you can get paid or make a career out of doing it. See what I'm saying? Even as amazing as AI art generators are, it's difficult to make a career out of using and making AI art, basically they're not going to actually replace real handmade, hand drawn, hand painted, hand sculpted artists. Not by a longshot. 

    Now, that doesn't mean that real artists should shun the AI art generators and throw a tantrum, rather they should use it to enhance their creative abilities and artistic potential. Those that don't learn the new softwares, AI art generators, and products won't be quite as successful as those who do. For example, a lot of Americans love Japanese cartoons anime and whatnot. A lot of Japanese art studios are using AI in anime and have already been doing so for years. 

    I wanted to rant a bit on AI because I keep seeing that people are thinking AI is really amazing and great, and yeah it is, but only up to a very limited point. For example, AI could write something like what this post has written in it, but it can't do it with my personal style, timbre, or swagger. It will always pale in comparison to the real human behind the AI, the ghost in the machine will never be as smart, creative, or innovative as the human in front of the screen. 

    Time after time, I keep seeing people using AI in a way that makes them look like they've never done any thinking for themselves, or if they do, they just haven't figured out the right way to calm down, clear their thoughts, and put themselves in order to actually organize what they want to accomplish, so using AI becomes like their crutch. That's not a surprise and I'm seeing that more and more with customers in the retail environment checking prices with AI, employees checking prices with AI, and my various friends and associates around me who use it for their various reasons. That being said, I'll post my various most recent AI art pictures below this post. 

    Third, the Culture we live within has changed a lot since the 2008 Financial Meltdown during the Obama Presidency, which, oddly enough, seemed like a very normal time period and it didn't really seem that crazy even though we had gone through September 11 and the Iraq War and whatnot. In comparison, the post-covid Trump years seem much worse and the culture has become debased, extremely right-wing, nationalistic, and the main problem imo, very dumbed down and stupid to the point where people don't even do basic things like read and write anymore. 

    That being said, I am the Culture too and I'm here to say to young people its okay to be smart, you don't have to pretend to be dumbed down around other people, you should read books, write, educate yourself to the best of your abilities, and who knows, maybe you're goodwill and influence will spread to others around you and they will become smarter just by having interacted with you even briefly. One can only hope.

    I fear that we're in such a dumbed down society that because people are very uneducated and unschooled and have less morals and standards, these qualities in a nation, in a state, in a city even, even in a job or workplace, this means that things are much more disorganized and it makes it easier for bad actors to wreck havoc in various forms. 

    One of the scariest things that has happened to me recently is that something bad or off happened [not particularly to me but near or around me] and pretty much everyone including those in charge and those who were subalterns were all basically so dumb that they didn't do the right things and things went south. I think for me the fact that I was surrounded by people who just wouldn't think it through for whatever reasons, people who just couldn't think at all very well, that for me, was absolutely terrifying.

    Lastly, I'll end it like this. I'm not exactly a stable genius like Trump says he is, [he's a dumbass lol] but I've gone through a lot of work to educate myself without even going to school or anything, and when I interact with other young people 20s, 30s, even my own age, there is a general vast difference in the amount of knowledge between those people and say people who are in their 40s-80s. 

    One of the things you'll find is that even older people could be a bit uneducated and set in their ways but overall, they have more common sense and smarts that those of us in our 20s, 30s. Respect your elders and learn from them, without them you would never really be able to become wise which is above being learned. 

    I'll end it like this, if you aren't very well studied, don't read or educate yourself in anyway whatsoever, you just can't really become successful in life or in your goals. How do I know this? I've learned this the hard way through the school of hard knocks. I struggled through my 20s and 30s and I didn't go to school, I never got a degree, I'm just a 40 year old black guy with a high school diploma, an imagination, and curiosity. Nowadays, most people are kind of coasting, trying to provide for their wives, their kids, its hard to actually free your mind and educate yourself. 

    If you ask me, this is the main reason why Trump came to power and the country is in decline. If you keep the Culture happy with futbol [special shoutout to the World Cup], football, basketball, videogames, porn, sex, drugs, alcohol, its no wonder that they would never really be able to think for themselves. Remember, knowledges makes a man unfit to be a slave. Watch this space.

October Thoughts

 

Good evening ladies and gentlemen. I had a day off from work today and decided to jot down/share some ideas. 

First, ever notice that time is moving way too fast? I spent some time in between jobs and it was like a blur. Now I'm in a new job and every workday just zooms by. I feel like, especially as I get older, that time is increasingly escaping me. Even now, I'm writing this at two in the morning on a weekday day off from work. I usually don't get to stay up this late anymore and its been more difficult to get into the mode for writing asI prefer to do writing late at night. 

There's been a time loop thing ever since covid. Ever since covid time just seems to fly by. I'm struggling to keep up with all my old hobbies and work seems to get even more in the way nowadays with changing shifts from closing nights to opening mornings the next day[s] after. As the Grateful Dead ask in a song, "Where does the time go?" 

Second, I've seen better days, like the song by Smashmouth. "Missed the bus, but I'm in no hurry." It's been harder to stay consistently happy all the time because it seems like everything is turning, "We're turning again," -Zappa. The truth of the matter is that I'm actually doing very well and have most of what I need but there's always that sense that something's missing, or that I'm missing out on stuff.

For example, I like my new job but overall, its somewhat more stressful than what I was doing previously. Also, it's less pay, more responsibility, more stuff and details, and more intimate work setting with co-workers. Not exactly fan favorites of a work environment, especially when you're not running the place yourself as manager. But I'd rather be optimistic about things that aren't going well in this moment. I do realize that I'm doing well, have decent health, and a roof over my head. Sometimes you have to be grateful for what you have even if it could be better. For example, even when I wasn't working for a little while, I wasn't really struggling as much as other people I know, even when those people were employed working at their jobs, they were still doing worse than I was. "Back in the USSR, you don't know how lucky you are, boy." 

Third, I realize that I've kind of been procrastinating and squandering a lot of time. I've been way too involved in online video gaming. However, I've also been reading a lot too. Just before writing this now, I finished reading Leon Battista Alberti On Painting, an amazing historical document written during the Florentine art era. It is an eye-opening read, albeit very intellectual, but difficult to understand because of the historical translation from Latin and Italian into something a modern English reader could understand. Yes, it's readable, but not all of it flows easily into a modern english meaning. Prolix, and way too intellectual in describing art, however, Alberti was almost more of a humanist learner than a painter, and was better at doing architecture. 

Another book I read before that was Herzog by Saul Bellow. It won the U.S. National Book Award for Fiction and the Prix International. This was a great book as it describes the downward spiral of a very Jewish intellectual professor as his wife and kids leave him to shack up with his psychiatrist, ouch. Herzog goes somewhat crazy, manic, and at one point puts his father's old loaded gun into his pocket and goes to visit his ex-wife and pick up the kid. He doesn't do anything with it, but he gets caught with it and booked by the cops. The book even ends on a manic note when he's back at his estate in a remote area, and he hires this nanny to clean up his house, and he's just watching her clean. I had a Jewish best friend that reminds me of Herzog. He had everything he could have wanted at one point and it all just went away and he went into a manic episode. Never saw him again after that. This book was very realistic. 

Lastly, I've been trying to stay focused. I've been reading a lot and listening to a lot of jazz music. I do think I need to lay off the video games for a while to make more time for more creative arts, writing, and music. For example, I'm still interested in AI but have yet to make much progress in AI art or video, mostly because I haven't been devoting too much time to it and I feel like AI has been eclipsed by the commercial state of American advertising through media on the internet, TV, smartphones, and in real life. 

We're so programmed to just buy and consume to make up for our lack of happiness, why would anyone think using AI would make them happy? In a way I would say AI has already been eclipsed by consumerism, even the overconsumption of say right-wing and left-wing news that taken a toll on our society. I do think we as a people, as The Culture, need to become more self-aware of things we're buying and the media we are consuming. 

I know that sounds like a intellectual outsider sort of rant but I think there's something to it there. Like for example, when I mentioned earlier that I've been playing too many videogames, I think the first step is being aware that you're spending too much time on that sort of media consumption, and then going forward you can adjust your plans to do other things and not give all your attention to it. In addition, I mentioned that time seems to be speeding away from me, well, in a way, yes it is. I'm getting older and my health is getting worse here and there. I will use that as motivation to do more of what I really want to do, and spend less time overconsuming digital content. These are basic ideas but not always discussed. Watch this space. 

The owl of Minerva appears at dusk. 

Beware the Ides of March

Well, here we are. 2 13 AM on a Wednesday morning. It's March 19, 2025. Something like day 60 of the Trump recaptured White House. Here, I'll go into some details about life, music, AI, and politics. the usual subjects as of late. 

First, life is what you make it. Regardless of the fact that the United States has entered unchartered territory, life is still somehow amazing. Why? Because I have the capacity for happiness. That's not to say that bad things won't happen, I mean, that's Murphy's Law. But, what I mean to say is that regardless of all the bad things that are happening in the world, or possibly even in our lives and in our loved ones' lives, we should all learn to have the capacity for happiness, and realize, and see/acknowledge, that regardless of how much or how little we have, we all have a lot to be grateful for, in one way or another. Even if you don't believe in God.

Case in point, I'm not necessarily in the best position right now. I'm currently unemployed, after working as a retail grocery cashier for the last ten years straight. This is a mega-change for me, as I'm used to working nonstop 5-6 days per week. And now? Nothing. No weekly paycheck, no cute girl coworkers to talk to or hangout with, no affirmation from customers [mostly beautiful women] telling me I'm doing a good job, no steady schedule of any kind. The biggest problem is that I lost a good form of structure in my life. I miss it and am trying to get back into the job market as soon as I can. 

So, the response to this has been to create a new sort of order to my life. In whatever way I can. For me, this has meant turning more inwards towards books, music, AI, exercise, and cultivating a good clean headspace for me to be in as much as I can. I've found that a lot of my friends/associates from the retail grocery world are much more miserable than I am. Not only that, but they have a lot of health problems like drugs/alcohol, behavioral issues, they don't have money, and the ones that do, they tend to not enjoy their lives because of various reasons like: relationship troubles and lack of purpose working within retail grocery. On top of that, most of them whine and complain like there's no tomorrow. So what's the issue, doc? They simply lack the capacity for happiness. That's right! 

Second, music. I'm finding that music has more often than not, has become more of a background experience for most listeners. Like how all these years I've been going to the bar for music, almost all of the music never mattered, because the audience just uses it as background to drink beer to. This has been true for a long time now, but I think it will become even more so in the coming months and years. 

Why? Because of the advent and widespread usage and acceptance of AI by intellectuals, techies, nerds, artists, musicians, writers, and even the GOP itself, we're finding that AI content is not only accepted, but people are more and more willing to use it for, well, pretty much anything and everything. This includes using AI content for music generation and video generation. And once that content becomes more commonplace and accepted, I think real, live, musicians will be in trouble because people will say, "If I can get an AI orchestra to play Mozart, why would I need to pay a real orchestra?" It sounds a little off but I think it's already happening. Case in point, music production software that increasingly replaces live musicians, although that's been happening for a long time now.  

Third, going back to AI. Right now we live in a world where the Tech Bros are winning at everything and anything. Contrary to popular opinion, while I think AI is a gamechanger and a must use tool for creatives of any kind, I also acknowledge that AI is another weapon in the tech oligarch toolbelt, that can be potentially used to intentionally AND unintentionally harm people who don't use it and understand it. So yes, all this AI stuff is mind-blowing and amazing and it will make you more creative and techy and more computer savvy, but what about all the people who are opposed to it, either they don't like it or they just don't want to use it or acknowledge it? 

Well, unfortunate to say, those people will simply get left behind. People that don't acknowledge, use, or stay informed on AI will find that other people around them will eventually start using it more and more, adding it to their daily routines, and they will catch up to where the Culture is on AI. Right now I think most people are still asleep at the wheel when it comes to AI, as I also believe most people are asleep at the wheel in terms of politics. It's especially important to keep in mind that right now, in some aspects, AI and politics are interlinked, as some liberal thinkers believe that it's because of AI's algorithms that Trump was able to recapture the White House. That's right folks. Beware the Ides of March. 

Lastly, politics. So you see all these things are interlinked [Bladerunner 2049, Ryan Gosling: Interlinked]. The Tech Bros were at the White House inauguration. That's because technology has always been a tool in electing public officials, probably starting with the printing press back in Europe over hundreds of years ago. But now, with the power of AI algorithms, we're finding that controlling the flow and access of various forms of media, in fact, controlling ALL of the flow and access of media, has been very easy for the Republican and Democrats to do, utilizing the new emerging technologies like AI algorithms created by these Tech Bros like Open AI's Sam Altman, who was at the inauguration at the White House when Trump was re-elected. 

It would be nice if people who were using AI were all nice well-to-do dandy intellectual techie guys who want to make the world a better place. But increasingly, more and more, I'm finding that its usually always the opposite, especially when you tune into the media and the news daily and are really reading and paying attention to what's going on. In a truly fucked up way, I think, increasingly, people who use AI look down upon people who are unfamiliar with it and/or don't know about it or don't use it, they're being looked down upon, as like cavemen, as country hicks, or lesser than, simply because they aren't in tune with what's going on with the emerging tech and how it's being utilized to help destroy our late period capitalistic society. 

But for the most part people are asleep at the wheel. We still believe in the Rule of Law. We believe that as long as we go to work, listen to our bosses, do a good job, come home to our families and take care of our wives and kids, that everything's going to be alright, as long we got cash, a car, a home, a wife, and our 2.5 kids and a dog. Well, what if we're asleep at the wheel and we're Caesar and we're about to get stabbed? "And you too, Brutus?" 

Good news for people who love bad news. Watch this space.

[image AI generated] 

Things I learned From Shows in Los Angeles

Letter from the composer: [sends me chords to play on piano]

Me: Thanks, I'll check them out. 

Happy New Year. Kind of bummed out with a work situation at the moment. But the music is keeping me going. The last couple nights I've been going to shows at the bar and figuring out how the sound technician gets all the sounds. I figured it out. 

There are monitors, subwoofers inside the bar on the top of corners on the ceiling. 

The owner only wants the sound tech to only use the brand new [digital equipment]. But he doesn't want to because he likes a more traditional system. 

The owners says the traditional system is too loud. So he can't use it every night. So he's been loading different equipment [a more fancier analog system] all by himself for different nights in a large SUV style van. Not good because the guy is 64 years old. 

The answer to this dilemma is that he must use a smaller sound system for each and every night. But he doesn't want to because he wants to do what he wants, and is reluctant to do anything the owner says because they've been working together for a long time and they have some sort of dispute about it. 

However, the sound technician showed me the older more basic [analog log system that's very small] and I saw that everything that it had was acceptable and could work within the small confines of a small local Encino bar. 

So, you find that the sound systems used to record music are not important at all to the sound of the recording. 

Rather, it is the direction of sound that is placed or pointed at the audience that determines the sound more than anything else. 

In conclusion, theoretically speaking, you could record a classical music album on an iphone 12. 

Keep in mind, this guy used to run sound for Black Flag.

Happy New Year! 

may gloom, june bloom!

Goodbye May gloom, hello June bloom! Looks like even the weather's trying to keep up with my mood swings. What can I say, I'm feeling kind of blue. But this too, shall pass.

Here we are in May. Six months from now we will have a new American President. I think Trump will actually win the election. The court cases and the sensational news about it, every excruciating detail even the stuff about Stormy Daniels, has somehow made Trump even stronger. I think his base are more fired up than ever, and they're around me everyday at the supermarket. Woe is me. Hopefully violence doesn't break out. 

Why I think this. Well, for starters, I think Biden has alienated a lot of his base. People like me, young people, people of culture who vote and think and read and have jobs and families, people who usually always vote democrat, I think Biden has really messed with this set of peoples. However, I think one part of his base that will remain loyal to him no matter what is black women, a large portion of the democratic base. 

I don't want Biden to be President, and I think he's doing a disservice to the world community by funding and sending arms to Israel to use against the war in Gaza, but to be fair, what it really has become, is the Israeli military beating and blowing up Gazan civilians and destroying their infrastructure, now leading to famine. 

I think the outrage and disgust against this war will ultimately result in the loss for the democrats and lead to the takeover of America by the republican party, sponsoring Trump to rule as a fascist despot in the guise of a republican party leader. Almost like some bad nazi won the war movie. That's worst case scenario. And I know you know and think that Americans don't want this. But what if they 0 don't consider swing voters enough 1 don't show up to vote 2 vote for trump 3 end up being okay with being run by a fascist despot, because after all 1 i got mine and 2 those other people don't matter and 3 they should work harder. These are things you've got to think about if you're being realistic. 

Next, the pressing issue of people in today's society and culture. Now, it seems to be that most people out there are not taking care of business. Your parents aren't taking care of business, your managers aren't taking care of business, your friends aren't taking care of business, you have to take care of business yourself. 

So this means you can't just turn on, tune in, and drop out like Timothy Leary. Although many of the older American friends of mine have turned on to this decadent hippie lifestyle. What they'll do is find a way to finance themselves in the easiest way possible, barely work, have a house for them and a girlfriend/wife, and just coast while drinking a lot and perhaps indulging in some occasional recreational drug use. 

Keep in mind I work at a supermarket so I can see and tell you that there alcoholics that come to me to purchase liquor everyday at the same times and they're hardcore alcoholics and it's like a way of life to these people. They come to me to ring it up every time possibly because they think I won't judge them as harshly as the other cashiers, I'm known to be something of a Papa Genu. 

My point; when you have a society, an entire culture wasted by alcohol and recreational drugs like marijuana and cocaine, you have a recipe for mental health disaster. We have not reaped the benefits of the so-called acid generation. In fact, they're a big part of the problem since the 1960s. I'm not saying the conservatives were right, but I'm saying there's been a big problem with the entire liberal agenda, the entire scene, it's all wrong-headed and stupid, and has contributed to moral hazard. 

After all, I am a moral conservative. But one that isn't closeminded to change or adaptation to change. I think change is a big part of the culture, history, society, and government of the United States. I think one of the biggest problems in America today is that we aren't open enough to change. How can you explain the fact that its election 2024 Biden versus Trump yet again. These guys have one foot in the grave and we're giving them a chance to run for president yet again? What does that tell you about us, as a society, as a people, as a culture? 

We live in a society where the culture goes anyway the wind blows. A pop culture, where the average student is weaned to become a consumer of almost any type of goods from any country. When you walk down the street or go to businesses there's more often than not, people making a spectacle of themselves for some reason or other. I see it almost every night at work. These are like happenings, but not the good type of happenings like a concert in the park on an afternoon.

The culture has become debased. We have young people tuned in on video games, tiktok, porn, TV, movies, social media, alcohol, drugs, but not really making the money needed to live a better life or the life they want. They don't contribute to the society in any meaningful way expect putting their hard earned money back into the economy, allowing the invisible hand to do what it will. We have so much of everything that it's literally hurting us to the point where people can not and will not think for themselves. 

Every time you get in an argument with your parents, your managers, your friends, your so-called acquaintances, think about why they were angry and think about the fact that they're not taking care of business. Why should you explain yourself to someone who's completely tuned out and isn't taking care of business? So you see there is a sort of hypocrisy there. 

But wait, there's more. There's still hope yet for you. Through change. Change is the total mass retain. By change you will come to who you are, see things for what they are, and hopefully come to some understanding to develop strategies into which you can transform your world, your environment into whatever you want it to be, leading through your own personal example, but also by going in there and breaking things. The right kind of outside character already knows this, the outsider. But not all of us are outsiders, some of us are children of the wasted acid generation, who didn't have a clue and still don't, especially now that they're getting older. 

The last part here is the most important. You have to learn to think for yourself. Question everything, question even what I have written here, question yourself, question your own thoughts and ideas, but keep a reality principal, make sure you understand and know what is real and what is not, learn to become smarter so you can more easily define and compare good and evil. I know this is basic but you would be surprised how many people don't know this because they think doctors, lawyers, parents, wives, girlfriends, or therapists will help them and somehow they'll 'figure it all out.' 

Of course, today, anyone with an iq above 28 is a threat to society and is automatically labeled an outsider, even if he knows it or not. Why? Drugs and alcoholism has taken over critical thinking in the younger classes and disillusionment and powerlessness have overtaken the older generations to the point where most of them are tuned out to the pop culture world and live in a small capsule. 

Is this the end of civilization part III? 

Surviving the Zombie Apocalypse Virus pt. 10

It's 2021/11/9 evening. Covid is still running strong after nearly a year and a half of divisive health guidelines from doctors and politicians, and misinformed idiot citizens who don't want to be vaccinated. Our government is run by two parties, one of which denies climate change and has rallied the Trump demagogue to vote Republican, no mask, no vaccines. Jobs are hard to come by, good pay and benefits have gone up in an era where its a struggle to get people back on track on a working career in their respective fields. Climate change and global warning is a hot boiling point issue but the worlds powers can't seem to get it together. A billionaire nerd plays with the idea of ending world hunger. 

Is this what I thought being an adult would be like when I grew up? Is this some sort dystopian fiction novel? No, but indeed there are some similarities. Here I want to get into more of the nitty gritty on life during the pandemic, working in a grocery store, and how I've been dealing with the pandemic on those terms. 

Life during the pandemic has been an easy transition for me. I wake up early in the morning, I go to work, I come home, I have recreation time for reading, guitar, and friends, and I rinse and repeat. It's quite the good life, as I pretty much get to do whatever I want, provided I make sure to get to work on time in the mornings. Evenings are always free to do whatever. 

Work has been more intense than home life. Working on the job has its stress but the added traffic of extra customers since the pandemic has given most of the staff more than they can handle. We have limited employees at any one given time and on top of that, there's high turnover, and it's been difficult to get new hires to stay and/or keep hiring more new employees. It really is a conundrum getting people, anyone, to work these grocery store retail jobs these days. The peoples who usually stay are young people who live with their parents, young people who go to college, and middle aged people who have been in retail their whole lives. In short, we don't have enough help and can't keep the help we do get.  

My personal role at the store has become more streamlined and my job itself has become a lot easier. So in that sense I can't really complain too much.

How have I been dealing with the pandemic? I read a lot of books, I listen to a lot of music, I play a lot of guitar, writing more blogs now and then, and I text and hangout with friends occasionally. To be honest, it's an amazing life and I'm really lucky I get to do these great things I love to do. My job surprisingly gives me a lot of freedom in my recreation hours to truly become inspired, come alive, and be myself. That won't happen in the world or retail. You have to make the time to build and develop an interior life outside of the working hours on the job.

Weather it's through my guitar playing, reading, or writing, I can truly say that I'm never really bored. There's always something new to learn, something new to explore, new avenues to travel along. This gift of curiosity has led me to learn jazz guitar, listen to the classical music canon, and read the western canon.  

In a time when people are really struggling I'm thriving, for now, praise be to God. When I look back at this time in the future, I can say that I had a great life during covid. Amen! 

Also check out my covid plague journal! http://ofigueroamusic.blogspot.com/p/blog-page.html

King Crimson

Today was an interesting morning. As soon as I woke up I kept thinking about a certain King Crimson song. The song was Lament from their album Starless and Bible Black. It's a terrific record, as most of their early records and late records are. What makes that song in particular so interesting that I was reciting them in my head upon wake up?

Well, the song is, well, a lament of sorts. The song features some interesting lines. Here are some:

I guess I tried to show you how
I'd take the crowd with my guitar
And business men would clap their hands
And clip another fat cigar

 

But now it seems the bubble's burst
Although you know there was a time
When love songs gathered in my head
With poetry in every line

 

I like the way you look at me
You're laughing too down there inside
I took my chance and you took yours
You crewed my ship, we missed the tide

 

And strong men strove to hold the doors
While with my friends I passed the age
When people stomped on dirty floors
Before I trod the rock'n'roll stage

 

Those are all pretty damn good lines for vocals. Even in the 70s. And the music was topnotch art-rock with heavy feedback guitar and mellotron [a synth].  

So yeah those lines in particular really stood out to me. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I can't escape the influence of King Crimson on my life. When I was 19 years old I would sit in the freezing basement in Wisconsin. I would invite my friend David over and we would smoke a lot of weed and blast progressive rock. But it was always King Crimson that was our favorite progressive band from England. 

 

There's something about King Crimson that makes them stand out apart from the other English art-rock bands from the 1970s. Robert Fripp's guitar playing and lead role in forming and keeping the band going through many permutations made them a much better band than say, ELP, Genesis, and even Yes. Fripp was a art-rock guitar god. He knew how to play any chord for any feeling. He was like a jazz guitarist in a rock band. He knew many great 'noise chords,' as I would call it, but he could always mellow out and play something that a nice jazz guitarist could play. I credit him for this day for helping me develop my guitar sound. 

 

 

What's also interesting is the fact that when my friend and I were listening to King Crimson stoned all those years ago is that we are both black kids. I know this might be kind of arrogant to think, [but I definitely believe this is true] but I actually believe that David and I were probably the only black kids [or at least part of a very select few] in America in the mid 2000s that listened to and loved King Crimson. That's actually truly remarkable. 

 

King Crimson is one of my favorite bands. I listened to them more than any other band from England, including those four lads from Liverpool [who they were inspired by of course]. Their legacy lives on. Fripp was and still is a monster and I credit him [and countless others] for inspiring me to make noise on the guitar. The art-rock thing died but its influence will live forever through indie rock and its noise variants.

 

As Pete Townsend [the guitarist from The Who] said about the first album, the critically acclaimed In the Court of the Crimson King, "an uncanny masterpiece."

Surviving the Zombie Apocalypse Virus pt.1

So things have been pretty crazy as of late. Yes, I know that sounds like a broken record at this point. But this is unprecedented. I've never seen anything like this my entire life. This is what it's like during wartime by the way for all you youngsters out there. I've decided I'm going to start a series about life during the virus. Really get into the nitty-gritty details. Some of it might be a bore but nonetheless, I think it's an important time to write down all our thoughts on digital paper [ :D ] while the crisis goes on. Who knows,  maybe it will be of use to us as a record. Life during the New Dark Ages. I coined that term first. You read it here first folks. 

Okay, so I've decided on calling the coronavirus the zombie apocalypse virus because for one thing it just sounds way cooler. Much sexier. Yes, I know that corona apocalypse has been trending on Twitter but let's face it folks, that name sucks. The zombie apocalypse virus is better. Because essentially that's sort of what it's like. Sure there are no real zombies walking around but the fact that there are people who have the virus who don't know they have the virus makes them a lot like zombies. And the fact that the elderly are at risk too. Zombies would love killing old people. Oh, the humanity! 

But seriously! Okay, so work has been pretty intense the last two weeks straight. Just in case you're new here, I work retail at a grocery store. Yeah, I know, hard to believe a guy who works retail spends all his time reading science fiction and philosophy. 

We've been swamped with so many freakin' customers nonstop. The first two weeks were absolutely nuts. No carts, no wipes by the door, no bags for the groceries to be put into, no water, no wipes, no sanitizer, no toilet paper, and that was just the first two weeks. We could barely get the customers out and sometimes the wait times were 20 mins or longer. 

The parking lot is a disaster zone. You can't even walk out into the parking lot without possibly getting run over. People are in mass pandemic panic mode right now. It's scary. Ce la vie, that's life. Keep in mind that they just closed another branch of our store down the street so we have all this increased traffic from that recently closed store. Adding to that is the fact that our store is also remodeling the store every night for the next two months. Bad timing! 

So two weeks of this go by. The workers are exhausted. Management doesn't have a clue what they're dealing with. Especially with the sickness and/or spread of it. Enter week three. The store runs out of most items. Most items. Almost all the shelves in the store are empty. Everyday. All-day. The only time we can restock the shelves is at night when the store is closed. The solution? We open later and close earlier. New emergency coronavirus store hours: 8am to 8pm, every day, indefinitely. This is every grocery chain out here by the way. Oh, boy!

Despite the fact that the store is closing early every night, management is still making a lot of the staff stay late during the evenings, some of us as late as 1am, which is my normal gig at that little store. We clean, grab all the carts in the parking lot, take out the garbage, and put all the gobacks back where they belong. It ain't much but it's honest work. There's a real art to the gobacks work now. With almost all the items gone, mia from the shelves, you have to match all the items with the UPC code stickers and find the items that way. It's a bitch. I don't even think upper management would have the patience for that kind of work. They would say it's beneath them. Or perhaps they would get frustrated instantly with how tedious it truly is? You decide. Either way, it's definitely one way of making us work hard for our paycheck.   

The one thing that is very scary about the retail gig and the zombie apocalypse virus going on at the same time is the fact that there's a reported case of the virus at a hospital nearby, and I'm in physical contact with all these customers, potentially an unlimited amount every day I work and continue to work, and potentially unlimited items every item that I touch every time I work. The reality of the matter is that nobody in my town except the one case has been tested so even if they show symptoms they can just ignore going to the doctor, keep living their lives, and nobody would be the wiser. What a sick twisted turn of fate.  At first, it was a comedy, now it is a tragedy.

Luckily I finally found some gloves that I can start wearing for my shift tomorrow. I've been washing my hands like crazy, drinking vitamin C supplements every day, and wearing a hat and sweater outdoors so I don't get sick. Even having a regular cold/flu at this time is horrible as it would look bad at the store when customers come in contact with me. Even my coworkers wouldn't like it.  The world goin' crazy.

Every day I look at the world from outside my window. I flip open my computer and read the latest news about the virus. I read slowly so I can understand every little detail. None of it is good. Nothing is getting better. It's only getting worse. The governor just announced that he's closing all bars and limiting numbers of peoples at restaurants and/or just closing them down. The elderly have been ordered to stay indoors as they are the most vulnerable. And possibly the most pigheaded and stubborn. Because I saw a lot of old people at work today. Very sickly old people. Not good. 

When we survive this it will be like a new age of enlightenment. People will all of a sudden become wiser, more humble, nicer, more serious. They won't go out for frappes as much. It will take losing a lot of happiness from social gatherings, a broken economy, and a quartine to bring the world to a better fate. I hope. 

This will be an ongoing series. Welcome to the New Dark Ages. If you catch the zombie apocalypse virus you will be quarantined for 14 days. Even if you don't get it your city might have to quarantine anyways. Don't touch your face. Wash your hands. What a way to live. In the end, the world doesn't end with us saving the girl in some war-torn country. Instead, we get super sick and pass it on to others. Oh, the irony!   

Welcome to the machine.

Where's the zen?

Hello, world. Things have been pretty hectic for me at the day job and all but I thought I'd make time before work today to write a post. I actually haven't been writing that much lately. But I have been reading constantly. I just finished Kant's Critique of Judgement, which, although it is half the length of Critique of Pure Reason, is just as technical and demanding on the budding philosophy learner. 

The topic of this post is happiness. Where's the zen in this day and age? Most of my retail associates, including management and upper management, don't seem to be happy and they're very vocal about it. To customers, to me, to their employees. The ironic thing is that even though management makes much more money than their employees, their employees are actually happier and nicer to be around, despite making less money and enduring more hardships. It's quite something. 

At first, you're kind of sympathetic to these sorts of people. And then you realize you shouldn't be. It isn't difficult to be happy in America. There are bums living in a box who are happier than rich people who would say, "I fucked a girl, but it was a shitty fuck," "I worked really hard at my job but the paycheck wasn't enough," "I'm a manager but its a shit job." There are so many of these people for which nothing will ever be enough for them. Therefore, you can't feel sympathetic to their plight because it isn't real. It's existential. 

I complain about the minor details of my life. The fact that they switched me to morning shifts after working night shifts for six years. But I'm not going to go on and on and on about it. I gave it a break after two weeks, lol. Because you realize that you still have to live life, work, and find happiness in whatever malure you are in. That's just the way life is. You have to deal with the hand you're dealt. And some people are dealt the worst hands. And others just love to complain about how bad they have it when in reality they have it better than most. 

So where's the zen? Where do you find happiness? Are we all just gray blobs that just run through emotions? Not at all. Naturally, you can only be happy if you have the capacity for happiness. If you lack the capacity for happiness nothing will ever be enough for you. 

Personally, I find happiness through art, literature, and music. I even find happiness from talking to others at work or wherever. Just sitting down to write about this brings me happiness because I know that I'm expressing myself from the heart. It's something meaningful. It isn't aimless. That's why I enjoy writing so much. Because I can express myself online in a sort of incognito way. 

I'm a happy person. Outgoing socially. In an age of antiquity, I would've joined the priesthood and become a saint. In modern times I'm a hipster artist intellectual musician type. My job isn't great but that's okay. Because I know that if I can't be happy now, I can never be happy. 

So where's the zen? It's inside of you. It's up to you. Within you, without you. 

Pools of sorrow, waves of joy
Are drifting through my opened mind
Possessing and caressing me [Across the Universe/The Beatles]

2020 First Post

2020 is here finally. I took a long break away from writing or blogging and only just now decided to write with only a wee bit amount of time before work. 

The retail gig is going alright but somehow I'm finding myself more and more willing to quit and do something else. It's interesting because my friends in the office job world don't seem to be faring too well either. "You want a real career. You need to go back to college or trade school." This is the kind of advice I get from my superiors and peers. The thing is that most of them are in the same boat as I am...yadda yadda. 

I've been chilling with a lot of friends. The power of friendship as they say in the Yugioh! hit anime. I've also been reading a lot. I just finished reading Immanuel Kant's Critique of Pure Reason, where he goes into many different concepts, ideas, logic, including metaphysics and the existence and/or nonexistence of God. It took me about three weeks to read. Even longer to grasp the concepts, some of which I'm still digesting through lectures on YouTube and philosophy forums. 

The power of philosophy never ceases to amaze me. Kant's categorical imperative, something as the Catholic, do others as you would unto yourself, really puts intellectual curiosity in the best light. This is that no matter no smart we are, no matter how much we know, we are to use that knowledge to make ourselves and the world better. Make the world a better place, and be a better person. 

I've been getting interested in other countries' philosophers, like the French, but for the moment I've been focusing on German Idealism, which primarily concerns Kant, Schelling, Fichte, and Hegel. 

On another note, Christmas was good and my dad got me a really great science fiction novel called Engine Summer by British writer John Crowley. From 1979, the book isn't your typical science fiction fanfare, meaning its a much more serious, artful, delicate sort of reading. Some of it seems quite pretty and childlike but I have to finish it to find out more. Although the book is an average length I'm taking my time with it because it is something that you want to enjoy. The writing has more of a laid back yet still elliptical sort of style. Not elliptical like William Gibson but still elliptical. Some of the concepts remind me of American science fiction but yet this is fundamentally different. 

I have a lot of library books checked out at all times. I have a very strong focus on reading. I only read one book at a time and I usually finish them. After Engine Summer I'll probably get to Kant's Critique of Judgement, his philosophy on art and beauty. Which, ironically, I found that many philosophy YouTubers focused more on Kant's Critique of Pure Judgement than his Critique of Pure Reason, when talking about his general concepts a general introduction to him. I found that interesting, considering that I thought Critique of Pure Reason was the more serious discourse. As you can see I've become very interested in philosophy. In a way, I've gone from a more typical reading background based on science fiction to a more classical aesthetic. I'm very proud of that and hope to learn and understand more. 

The first post in 2020. Glad to have made it to 2020. There's still struggle and contradiction but at least there's great literature to keep me going. More posts incoming. My break on writing is over.

Aldous Huxley's Doors of Perception and Heaven and Hell

“That humanity at large will ever be able to dispense with Artificial Paradises seems very unlikely. Most men and women lead lives at the worst so painful, at the best so monotonous, poor and limited that the urge to escape, the longing to transcend themselves if only for a few moments, is and has always been one of the principal appetites of the soul.” [The Doors of Perception]

I've picked up a lot of books over multiple library book sales. These are first-come, first-serve sales of mostly paperback but sometimes you can find handsome editions of hardcover novels. I picked up The Doors of Perception because I'm been inspired by the counterculture hippie movement since high school. The Doors was one of my favorite rock bands as a kid.

That's my paradigm. I'm mostly inspired through rock and roll rather than experimentation of drugs. But even as a youngster I was familiar with the Merry Pranksters, Timothy Leary, LSD, Sgt. Pepper, and "turn on, tune in, drop out." And of course, all my favorite American hippie rock bands supported all that stuff. The Doors named themselves after Huxley's Doors of Perception. This edition comes with a separate book entitled Heaven and Hell. Both of these short books explores the mind's remote frontiers and the unmapped areas of human consciousness. 

For starters, one of the main problems with these books is that its no longer apart of the zeitgeist or discourse. The idea of taking psychedelics in order to gain some insight into the spiritual self is no longer apart of the current paradigm. Native Americans were known to use peyote/mescaline for spiritual purposes. But do even they still do that today?  

The young people I know who have experimented with heavy drugs like LSD, mushrooms, cocaine, and heroine are using it in order to escape from their reality. Much like the quote above. They use drugs as a backlash against the real world because they feel they are suffering. Any release into paradise will suffice. Even if it only for but a moment. Drugs and alcohol relieve them from their suffering. Albeit only for a short while until they come down from the high. Knowing that, it's very difficult for millennials to truly understand anything that Huxley is talking about here. But I like a challenge. 

This isn't really a book. Rather its a dialogue of Huxley containing his trip on mescaline. Ironically the trip takes place in the world's largest pharmacy during the early stages of the trip. A bit of comedy for his mescaline trip.  What happens to someone under the influence of mescaline? 

a) Ability to think straight is little if at all reduced. You don't become stupid.
b) Visual impressions are greatly intensified and the eye recovers some of the perceptual innocence of childhood when the sensum was not immediately and automatically subordinated to the concept. Interest in space is diminished and interest in time falls almost to zero. 
c) Though the intellect remains unimpaired and though perception is enormously improved, the will suffers a profound change for the worse. The mescaline taker sees no reason for doing anything in particular and finds most of the causes for which, at ordinary times, he was prepared to act and suffer, profoundly uninteresting. He can't be bothered with them, for the good reason that he has better things to think about. 
d) These better things may be experienced (as I experienced them) "out there," or "in here," or in both worlds, the inner and the outer, simultaneously or successively. That they are better seems to be self-evident to all mescaline takers who come to the drug with a sound liver and an untroubled mind. [Doors of Perception]

Time meant nothing. Huxley mentions there was plenty of time. Not a concern. He also wasn't concerned by spatial forms. This could mean the distance between me to my computer screen as well as the matter of me writing this review and then finishing it. Neither mattered anymore. 

What really is important to him is experiencing and observing.  Looking around the room takes on a new perception and/or concepts of the things we see. Mescaline strips down concepts but allows you to see them for the first time, the beauty of it. 

Man-made art had little effect on him. He was humored by the fact that humans tried too hard to symbolize things. "How dare they?" "The audacity?" This goes alongside paintings as well as classical music composers. He was more mesmerized by nature than by human-made things. 

Heaven and Hell go into religious aspects. Huxley notes that in the middle ages Christians would beat themselves until wounds would fester [flagellants] and starve themselves until they literally saw visions. They would literally see the devil. The festering wounds would cause hallucinations. How about that? 

My favorite concept that Huxley mentions in heaven and hell is a simple one. If you are a mystic/artist, you must learn from the scholar. If you are a scholar you must learn from the mystic/artist. It makes perfect sense. Why isn't the world like that? Why aren't more people across different discipline working together and learning from each other? It makes me wonder what could have been.

The truth is that I would never do any hallucinatory drugs and this book doesn't make a convincing argument for me to find a dude off the street and buy some mescaline off him. Rather, I'm impressed with Huxley's experience. I'll take his word for it and agree that the experience changed him for the better. Even if it only changed him for that day I can see from his writing that it had a profound spiritual effect on him. None of these drugs should be used for recreational purposes. Hell, at this point I don't even believe marijuana should be used recreationally. Maybe I'm getting too old. Maybe I'm a square. Maybe drugs are good for people sometimes.

In the end, we are all riders on the storm.  

The Sirens of Titan

“I was a victim of a series of accidents, as are we all.”

The Sirens of Titan by Kurt Vonnegut is a satire science fiction novel from '59. The story is about a guy named Malachi Constant, who is told by a man-playing-God figure stuck in space via something called 'chrono-synclastic infundibulum', that he's going to marry his wife Beatrice, have a kid with her, and end up living [and dying] on Titan, one of Saturn's moons. Malachi, the richest man on Earth does everything in his power to make sure none of that happens. He responds by throwing the best damn party ever and loses all his money.

The first Vonnegut book I read was Slaughterhouse-Five, check out my review for that book here.  I liked The Sirens of Titan much more than Slaughterhouse-Five. And that's because Sirens is much more of a science fiction novel, with grandiose ideas about life, sprinkled with tons of satire, with what I call dark humor or black comedy. Siren's has a very breezy, easy reading style just like Slaughterhouse. The ideas are many but are rooted more in science fiction here than in Slaughter-house, which is why I liked it much better. After all, I'm a science fiction guy. 

There are two obvious themes of the novel. Free will is one of them. Vonnegut suggests that we are victims of a series of accidents, as its quoted from the story. Malachi Constant, Unk, Beatrice, Chrono, the Tralfamore robot [the reason why all this is happening is so the robot can get a part to go home], and Winston Niles Rumford don't have free will. Random events put them in the positions they were in and there's nothing they could say or do that could influence the unpredictable. 

The other theme is the philosophical one. The meaning of life. Vonnegut suggests that everyone knows how to find the meaning of life by themselves. Although there's no free will we can find meaning and purpose in life. And the purpose of life, no matter who's controlling it, is to love whoever is around to be loved. If I wasn't single this would be more meaningful. :D

Life is meaningless but we should be happy. No matter what happens we have the option to make life meaningful. That's what makes us different from the music organisms on Titan, what makes us human.  

Going forward, this isn't your typical 50's pulp science fiction novel, although technically it is a 'pulp 50's science fiction novel'. What I mean is that if you're into Heinlein, Asimov, and Alfred Bester, you'll notice that this is an entirely different animal. Although there are spaceships, a war between Martians and Earth, and Universal Will To Become [metaphysics perhaps] to power spaceships, Vonnegut is using science fiction to tell an allegorical story about life. With ideas and philosophy that is anti-war, anti-religion, and anti-Bio-Mass [anti-society]. 

The science fiction element stems from the character Winston Niles Rumfoord, who, with his dog Kazak, accidentally becomes “chrono-synclastic infundibulated” during a space voyage. They're spread through space and time, appearing on planets sometimes. Vonnegut explains the phenomenon in his own inimitable way. Being spread through space and time allows Rumfoord to know everything that is past, present, and future. This allows Rumfoord to play God with the human race, with emphasis on Malachi Constant, and Rumfoord's wife, Beatrice. Rumfoord stages a war between the Martians [there's Martians living on Mars in this story too] and Earth just to make a point, to teach mankind a lesson. 

There are enough great ideas in this novel to be two or three novels. The characters are unpredictable, the humor is dark at times, and satirical, and philosophical themes make this a terrific science fiction treatise. 

To conclude, you don't have to look into grandiose ideas for what this story is really about. As a matter of fact its very simple. Vonnegut's satire ends with this conceit: All of mankind's purpose, past, present, and future is for this alien robot [the Tralfmadorian] to find this one little metal part [the size of a can opening lid], that will take him home.

I'm already reading more Vonnegut. I'm currently reading his first published novel Player Piano, which is much different from this style and voice-wise. Stay tuned to the page, as I will write my Player Piano review sometime soon.   

[original book cover art by Richard Power pictured above] 

Spiderman Into the Spiderverse

Spiderman Into the Spiderverse is one of those superhero flicks that you can really enjoy, maybe even more so than Avengers [fight me if you disagree!]. What makes this movie so enjoyable is that it goes into the human mind, the human framework of the superhero. It turns out that what makes superheroes super isn't their powers, but they're inherently human traits and characteristics, and perhaps even their failings. Here, we have a young black/Hispanic kid [just like me], who ends up getting spidey powers after getting bitten by a radioactive spider underground in some sewers.

Its the same old Spiderman story but this kid is a lot different from Peter Parker. His parents want him to go to this preppy smart kids school and he just wants to go to regular city house school. On top of that, he watches as Kingpin kills Spiderman! [Peter Parker] 

Not only that but it turns out that there's a multiverse which Kingpin is activating with the help of Doc Oc's [famous old Spidey villain] daughter, Liev. Once the multiverse is opened up Miles Morales [this movie's main star and Spiderman], ends up meeting a bunch of other Spidermans, and Spiderwomen. It turns out that Gwen Stacy [young girl, high school] is Spiderwoman. There's a steampunk Spiderman with a trench coat who fights nazi's in his world. There's a fat Peter Parker from another dimension where he breaks up with Mary Jane. There's an anime Spidergirl who uses a mech [modeled after Overwatch's D.Va maybe?] And there's even a Peter Porker, a Loony Toons inspired Spiderman who happens to be a talking pig. [Spider pig anyone?]

So the story here is that Miles has to fight Kingpin and shut down the multiverse machine they're running in order to send all these various Spider people back to their own universes. But there's all these problems along the way. Fat Peter Parker has to show him the ropes. He does this by just shoving Miles out into the fray, learning by doing. This isn't something Morales is good at right away. In fact, all the other Spider people think he isn't ready for a job this big and that in fact, Peter Parker should do it. Miles gets upset at this and tells them he will figure it out and do it on his own. Along the way he ends up fighting a villain named the Prowler, who turns out to be his uncle. When he lifts his mask to reveal himself to the Prowler, the Prowler doesn't kill him. When Kingpin sees this, he fires his gun at Prowler, killing him. This is the catalyst for Morales to become a true hero. Life is struggle and contradiction. You must persevere to get to the good stuff. 

So Miles ends up finding the strength and courage within himself to fight the good fight. This is pretty tough for a high school kid. After all, he saw Peter Parker get smashed to death by Kingpin. It could happen to him too! This is the main story and theme of the movie, and it is a great one. It shows you what it takes to become a hero. Sometimes it can take everything. 

The other great aspect of this movie is the computer animation. The colourful, glowing pixels here are astounding, some of the best in the business using today's current technology. Some other great animated movies come to mind; Rango, Incredibles, Big Hero 6, Coco, Wreck-It-Ralph. This movie is apart of long line of other great animated movies. Those pixels were lush man! And all the other Spider people had their own unique animations. The anime girl Spider had a unique anime look and attacks. The pig Spider had cartoon puns and a funny little hammer that he used to fight. [you have to suspend your belief for that one] Heck, even Peter Parker's fat looked realistic. The art style of the movie had a cartoon 3D look to it but it was still realistic. Certain video games come to mind, mainly Overwatch with its graphics. But to debase the art style down to say that it looks like a video game doesn't do it justice. It looks better than a video game. 

The cool thing is that there's going to be more animated films based off this story arc here. At the end, after the credits we see another Spiderman, this guy is named Miguel. Looks like we're going to start seeing a much different breed of supermen and superwomen in the future. More minorities and more women. Looks like Marvel is changing a lot for the better. 

*Puts hand on shoulder of hot girl* "Hey"