Aw Snap, Here We Go Again

Hello world, 

Things are moving forward, but things are volatile. It's like a caffeinated squirrel running around a funhouse of mirrors. You really never know what you're going to get. That's where we are right now. I'm mostly speaking in terms of the bigger picture, not just my own individual life. Here I'd like to jot down some notes on what's going on, what I think is the answers to it or possible answers, and just a general outlined update on what I've been up to and what I've been working on. 

First, the turmoil surrounding the larger story arc of the world, Russia vs Ukraine, but right now I'm especially worried about the turning point in the middle east, as we have the Israelis causing chaos there. I believe the Israelis are causing all this damage right now because they are trying to force the US into a large scale war inside the middle east, and, this part is very important, they want to try to force a Trump victory this November because they know Harris won't support Israel's proxies and killings. The best thing we can do is deescalate and not send troops to the middle east. 

In addition, there's more to this of course. I believe the disconnection between Americans has become so great that not only is democracy at risk, I believe that in a way, the citizens have already lost, regardless of whoever wins the election. Walk outside your door on any day and you can see, think, feel, hear, and maybe even smell the differences between everyone and everyone within every facet of life that you may encounter on any other day. And guess what? Almost all of those people see other Americans in this divided categorical way. Why? Because that's how this country has made their impact upon them, especially foreigners but also just average Americans. We need to keep moving forward and learn to see each other as human beings, not as these divided categories. 

Second, the disintegration of community within this country. Look around you everywhere you go. Everyone is all looking at something different; a different smartphone screen, a different political ideology, a different style of music, a different tribe in any and every way. This is almost too good to be true. How can a country be so mindlessly cast apart and separated as people? This is a question one should not answer, as I think there are many variables; infinite mass amounts of information, infinite mass amounts of bad and/or false information, and divide division and conquer tactics used by the boogiemen [like Trump and Maga Republicans] who are counting on their supporters to be a stupid b lazy c never change their opinions even though they know they are bad and/or wrong and harmful to their communities. 

Third, look at your own personal life for more examples of what I'm describing. I work at a grocery store where the division of work is highly routinized. There are clear divisions and separations between the hierarchy of the workplace. For example, on the front end where I work, there are from lowest to top; baggers, combos, cashiers, sales managers, front end managers, co-director, and store director. You find once you become ensconced in this line of work that there is a clear division and hierarchy. The managers at my store never once tried to lift me up and get me promoted for years even though I've stayed a very long time and showed my loyalty to the company through hard work, good work, and some customers may have even said that I've even had good cheer and all that good stuff. 

The problem is that through these divisions not everybody wants to see you succeed. In fact, a lot of people out there want to see you fail and lose everything; your wife, your children, your girlfriends, your job, your stuff, hour apartment, your home, everything. I've found that in particular, sales managers, front end managers, and co-directors especially have more than sometimes used their power to bring me down, take away privileges, write me up for bogus things, and in general try to get me not promoted to keep getting higher in the company. Why do you think that is? The answer lies in the psychological nature of the divided moment we live in. Even my co-director wants to see me fail, even he sees that because he is who he is with a better job and much more money and higher status, that whatever he says go and if I don't like it I would have to leave, and he doesn't see me as a good, hardworking, loyal employee, rather he wants to see me fail, and I would like to see him fail as well. 

Lastly, what does this mean? This means that the world that's described by the people you know or watch on TV or see on a smartphone or webpage screen is just one part of it; their world, but what is your truth, your story? No matter what ideological background that you originate from, most smart and good people want to bring more good to this world and keep working very hard to keep it good. But not everybody wants that. Like me, you might have a boss that wants to see you fail. I can respond by making his life hell in any way I can, but therein does not lie the true answer. The answer lies in fighting the good fight, fighting for what you believe in, and fighting to the very end. Those people out there, like the hateful boss, they want to see you fail, they want to see you give in to despair and become like many others or even themselves, who have given up with their lives in despair. Your life might not be great or even good right now but nothing lasts forever, even happiness. You might have to surprise yourself by how much fight you have in you, that you're actually made of much tougher stuff, and if given the chance, you would trounce any and all of your enemies in one attack like a ferocious lion. 

Take on thy sword of the spirit and fight on. Metaphorically speaking of course. Give them hell or worse. Replace their system with your own system, be more than a leader, be a creative leader.

Summer’s Last Caress: A Final Embrace of the Season

Happy August, everybody! It's nearly the end of summer, although summer is the hottest month in California, but the good news is here, temperatures are cooling down a bit, here and there, more or less. 

Here, I wanted to jot down some notes on the current state of affairs going on in my life, work life, recreational life, and the political affairs of the worldhood of the world. 

First, the democratic convention has been off to a great start. Trump failed to capitalize on his convention after he got shot at by an attempted assassin. I actually think Trump could have got much more leverage out of the shooting than he did. He could have appeared as a savior figure coming to face the United States of America but instead he played his same old playbook, yelling, complaining, and name calling any and whoever of his political enemies like a whiny brat. 

On the other side of the divide, the republican convention was a bore because it lacked star power other than Trump and Vance themselves. Here, with the democrats they really went all out. Even Oprah's speech was good. Bill Clinton. Obama. Michelle. Biden. And tonight at the end Tim Walz himself, the VP pick, who is now everybody's coach. I was trying to not really listen to every speech and everybody because I get tired of politics especially right now before the election but I have to say, some of these people and some of these speeches demand to be heard. I don't think you can say the same for the people who spoke at the republican convention. It's not an equal performance, the democrats looked, played it, and spoke much better with more depth, warmth, eloquence, and intelligence. Anyone who doesn't see that I reckon just isn't that bright. 

Moving forward, I'm not really the biggest Harris fan. I think she's what the democrats needed in the moment in order to keep up the momentum against Donald Trump and the MAGA wing of the republican party. However, I do think she represents the next step in the democratic party, she's the natural evolution, she's not an outsider, she's been in this politics business a long time, and she already has the skills to be a great president having served as Biden's VP. We know she's smart enough, we know she has the leadership skills, she speaks well, she appears in public, people like her, and she's a big hit with every crowd. 

In addition, Harris is definitely the choice. And if you're undecided just look back at what Trump did during his term. He barely built small sections of a wall, he did the Muslim ban, he called immigrants rapists and criminals, he did this stupid tariffs, he blamed covid on the Chinese and was very racist about it, he tried to persecute his political enemies even though he's the one who did all these crimes, and last but not least let's forget the Carroll case where he turned out to be a rapist, or slept with Stormy Daniels and paid her hush money, or said about John McCain being a soldier, "I like people who don't get captured, he's not patriotic," or the guy who said that soldiers who died were, "suckers and losers," the guy who helped cause the January 6 insurrection, and the guy who has 34 felony count indictments. This might be the worst guy ever to run for office ever. You don't have to be genius IQ level person to know that Trump doesn't care about working people and their families, rather, he cares about staying in office in order to hang onto control of his fate, because otherwise, he's probably going to be spending his final years in a prison cell with secret service watching him outside the door. 

Lastly on politics, I think republicans know that the Trump wave is over. They come out at the grocery store and when people steal they yell, "this is Biden's America," "only in Biden's America," they're quick to blame any of American's societal woes on the President when in reality that's not why people are going out and stealing groceries, they're stealing because they're struggling. Donald Trump isn't going to make things easier for the hard working families, rather, he's going to cut taxes for the wealthy, slap on tariffs, and increase your taxes. Donald Trump has promised to be a dictator on day one. We're here to make sure that doesn't happen. 

In other news, I've been working and reading a lot. I took a vacation a few weeks ago that was pretty satisfying. I read Great Expectations by Charles Dickens and now I'm reading A Tale of Two Cities, so I've been catching that early 19th century British novel feeling. I think Dickens is sort of a genius inspiration. All his characters are relatable, mostly working class, although there's always a few rich people here and there, but for the most part he writes about everyday people of that era, and he sort of brings them life through the page in a very inspiring way. It's definitely not modern writing but the writing is so good that I'm surprised I haven't quite checked it out all before. I had always heard of Dickens but never checked him out until now. I know that his work is mostly assigned at the high school level for English courses. I might go through his catalogue, Oliver Twist and David Copperfield are on my list.   

Also, work has been on the usual side. Nothing exciting, but hey, no news is good news. Management still tries to get in your face and tell you off here and there, but you just can't let it get to you. There's a lot of internal politics there because lower management is union and upper management is not union, so there's always that us versus them element within this work environment. You have to lay low and sort of stay lowkey in order to protect yourself and try to keep rising in the company. It's a slow grind, a long burn. I've probably worked with over 100 employees going back to 2013, I've worked with over 6 upper management store directors and assistant store managers, so in a way that's a great sign, if I can't beat them in the game, I can surely outlast them, inshallah. But the work gig isn't really as important as the other things I'm doing, mostly reading. I've even been getting better at Spanish too, which has become very helpful at work with a lot of the Hispanic people that come through at self-checkout. I sort of see that with languages knowing the basics is easy, but most people talk about things using the basics, so I sort of see that other languages can be pretty easy sometimes, but not all times. 

Lastly, I think the hardest thing to do right now is to be successful. Most people are not successful. Nearly every guy I know or have known through work [mostly all retail people] or via mutual people and friends of mine are not successful and are not at their best at this point in their lives. I've been lucky enough to have found a little success in this cruel world and the truth of the matter is that once you get a little success in this world, most people are going to sort of bad mouth you or try to undercut you or devalue in some way, they want to bring you down, they don't want to see you rise higher and higher, especially because you're rising above them. 

I see men my age sitting inside in high AC just playing video games all day without a care in the world, they waste their creativity on being couch slugs, slurping down soda, energy drinks, booze, and smoking marijuana, and wondering why their wife or girlfriend is mad about them playing video games all the time. 

If you're anything of an intelligent man who's successful, even in a small way, these other types of not-successful guys [also women] will sort of hate on you via different ways; they'll bother you at work about your job performance or try to get you into some sort of trouble there, they'll belittle or give you back-handed compliments, they'll try to add you on social media and never post or comment on anything but try to watch your every move because although they don't like you, they want to keep tabs on you. 

I suppose what I'm saying is that once you find success in whatever way, shape, or form, you'll find that its very lonely because oftentimes, people don't want to see you, particularly you, in a better position than they are in. This goes back to the green-eyed monster. This goes back to the Trump thing too. The America that the media and more importantly, the right wingers are portraying is the us versus them America, yeah that theory works if you're not that smart, but the reality is that the worldhood of the world is much more nuanced, complex, and grey than what is normally seen in media, especially in right wing media. So yeah, if you're successful, you'll find that people around you won't be, because it's you. But more often than not, other successful people will find you and lend a helping hand here and there, because they're successful enough to do it. 

Fin

Juneteenth 2024: Honoring Freedom's Triumph and Embracing Unity in Today's Narrative

On Juneteenth 2024, amidst the commemoration of historic strides towards freedom and unity, the air resonates with both celebration and profound reflection.

     How's it going out there? Everything going alright? Hello world. 

     First, I'd like to talk about work. There's been a lot of buzz at my grocery store job because recently there was a beating. It was captured on our store cameras, which somehow was handed over to the news, which is actually a big no-no inside our company. Apparently, there's an agreement sheet employees have to sign stating that if ever there arises any incidences in the store, we are not to talk to the media about it. An older employee, manager of the online department, an adult male, 50 years old, stopped a shoplifter earlier that day, a black lady, and she left without being able to steal her items. 

     However, later that day, she came back with two 'friends,' who accosted our employee from behind while he was working. He was beat up, and they even beat him with the garbage can. He seemed fine, as he was at work the next day, he didn't have too many bruises, but he was deeply rattled by the experience. When the news came to our store to ask to interview him, his answer was, 'no comment,' smart man, as he knows we're not supposed to talk to the media about whatever incidents might occur. 

     However, that's not all there is to the story. There seems to be more. On top of a customers being now scared to shop at our store [I actually had a few customers tell me they will be avoiding our store for a while, probably resulting in a small loss of business], I believe there is still fallout left to be had regarding this beating video incident. Management has become very tight lipped about it, and I believe shits rolling downhill in terms of some shit that might be about to go down. Managers are tight-lipped right now to the point where they appear rude and uncaring and mean to both employees and customers, which means that probably somebody is going to get in a lot of trouble; like perhaps a writeup, or suspension, something of that sort. Why? Because we as employees and managers aren't allowed to share video, talk about, or share any information regarding incidents that occur in the store. So the question is who did it and why? 

     So now, it's been a week later, possibly upper management will find out who went into the backroom, got the camera footage, and released it to the public news, and at some point someone will probably be punished for it. Why shouldn't they be punished? Think about it, we don't really know the reason why whoever did this released the video to the public news. They 'said [according to the news],' that they wanted the video out there because they want people to recognize the perpetrators in the video and hopefully they can be charged and/or punished legally. But I have to ask myself this question, did they release the video to the public news for cash money? So now I can see why certain managers in particular are angry, tight lipped, and/or confused on the job right now. There's a shit storm brewing! 

     Lastly on this issue, I'm not a big fan of upper management at my work, because they're major assholes that probably do deserve a good beating here and there because they low-ball hardworking people and pay them lower than they deserve, but my question to whatever management that released the store camera video of the beating to the public news, did you really think you would outsmart upper management? Only time will tell. 

     So, the store has become more hardcore. I've said this at other times throughout the years right here on this blog, especially during the plague journal covid years, but I think now it is at its worst point. It was almost to the breaking point during the covid years but somehow nothing major really happened, it's a blessing, as those were difficult years with lots of irate customers that sometimes wanted to get physical. 

     Well, now our old lady security guard doesn't work at night. Now, at night we have beefy armed security guards that are bigger than me [I'm 6 ft, 240  pounds], so the store is being much more closely guarded and secured by armed security. It has helped a lot but now I have that creeping unsuspecting feeling that the store has become like some sort of 'Big Brother is Watching You Zone,' which is totally not what I wanted, but it does seem to have made the job easier because I don't have to confront shoplifters as much, because armed security is already on it. 

     In addition, the store has had a Big Brother Watching You vibe for as long as I can remember, because upper management has a camera up above every cashier as they're working, 24/7, recording, but now it's got this added aggressive element, which, again, makes the job easier, but it is not the most comfortable vibe to work or shop. I think this is how most stores have become in America. Not really the kinds of places I would want to shop, especially if you're black, because most of the time, security guards in retail environments think blacks and hispanics are the most common perps, and in these businesses they're the ones who usually get caught stealing red-handed.

     Also, I wasn't really going to go here but because its Juneteenth, I saw Charlemane Tha God [a radio personalty] on Bill Maher last night and he said something that I think resonates with black America. He said if you're black in America you have to work five times as hard as a white person to get the same success. I think this quote speaks volumes to black people and people of color in general, not just black people. I think about my struggles and contradictions. Most of the newer staff at my work are young and dumb and they complain about the work most of the time they are there. One guy keeps complaining about doing carts all the time. I replied and told him that I pushed carts for years before I became a main-time cashier. And they reply back with a whip saying, "I'm not going to stay here as long as you did, you worked too hard for them," which you know, is a pretty dumb rebuttal, but hey, what can you do? I know for sure who has it in them to be a hard worker and who is a whiner and complainer and isn't helping the work staff on that fabled night shift I'm working on. 

     However, I think the quote says volumes. I would say as a black person in California, from out of the state, I worked five times harder than most white people I've known in my entire life, not just the ones from California, but also the ones from my home state of Wisconsin. Now, just because I know I worked five times harder than them doesn't mean that I think I'm better than them, it just means that I struggled more and persevered more. Is it because of my race? Yes, to a large degree, but that's how it is in America. Immigrants and people of color have to work harder than white people to compete in the same arena and get the same kind of success, that's just the reality. If you don't acknowledge this reality, you aren't living in America. But this doesn't mean that black people will work five times harder, not every black person will do that, some will barely work hard, and fall behind in the economic spectrum, or have to rely on a rich girlfriend or wife to support them. I think Biden's executive order allowing immigrants to become citizens via wives/husbands family was a big win for Juneteenth day. I know most immigrants that come here are usually hispanic but I think right now Biden needs to appeal to working class people of color to make sure he secures the votes to win this election. 

     Lastly, there's lots of reading, guitar, piano, ai art, political news, good meals, and good jazz and opera going around in my life but there's a feeling that the social culture is and has been collapsing. I find that the people I know or used to know are kind of lazy, dumb, and they all want to get rich quick. Nobody wants to work hard the traditional way, working a regular job and clocking in hours, like a moral conservative. 

     Instead, they've turned to these schemes and get out of jail tricks that they think will save their bacon so they don't have to work a 9 to 5 under a boss. One friend thinks inheriting stuff is the key, one friend to become a real estate guy, one friend to work multiple jobs and pay our friend rent, one guy to be an armed ATM security guard, one guy wants to become a full-time paid bassist but has no original songs and a weak voice. These guys are planning to break open pandora's box and hopefully it will save their bacon inshallah. 

     But again, nobody is staying consistent, working hard, building up, living clean and spiritually, having good energy with people they meet even on a bad day, and working their way up anymore. Now, people think they can get rich quick and that they don't need to pay their dues. It's deeply saddening and troubling. Because, in a sense, I see that most of the young and even older people around me are delusional. But hey, what can you do, its retail, right? I'm working the next nine days straight starting tomorrow afternoon. Wish me luck, God Speed. 

*Have a safe Juneteenth everybody, also summer covid is a thing, lots of people are getting sick*

June Five, Minds Alive: Explorations in the Intellect's Dive

Good evening ladies and gents, 

Just wanted to write, about anything here. 

First, what I've been up to lately. I've been working a lot at the retail grocery job but I'm also producing a lot of ai generated art featured on my Instagram, which can be seen here. In addition, I'm reading a lot. Right now I'm reading through George Eliot's Middlemarch. I'm also still practicing instruments, mostly guitar and piano. It's all time consuming. Plus sometimes I go out to the bar after work and chill with people there. In between I try to stay updated on what's happening in the news and whatnot. 

Next, Middlemarch is a very dry book. It's fiction but its so dry its almost like reading Gibbon's History of the Rise and Decline of the Roman Empire, which I happen to also be reading, but on my phone when I'm on work breaks, traveling on the bus, or laying down before bed. In those moments I finished Gibbon's volume 1 of the series. Fascinating material. I mentioned the Gibbon book to a customer the other day and he said, 'yeah, but did Gibbon write about how the Romans debased the currency?' I thought it was a minor thing to mention considering all the other stuff they did, but yeah, I sort of felt like the guy said that because he's trying to somehow form and correlate a modern day theory that we're like the Romans because the government has, in its own various methods, sort of debased our American currency. It was an interesting comment for him to focus on, or so I may think. 

However, Middlemarch is much more dry than the Gibbon because fiction isn't supposed to be so dry, it's supposed to be lifelike, literally coming to life off the page, that's what people go to fiction for, its infinite mana, its endless creativity, that drives us to keep turning the pages. What can I say about George Eliot? She writes about well off British people in the country, their marriages, their relationships, their struggles and contradictions with everything including their own personalities and shortcomings. Eliot is so brilliant that she even writes about upcoming technology, factories, and agriculture within the book, which takes place in 1829. In a sense, I think Eliot is almost too brilliant to become a beloved favorite writer or author, rather it is her authority as a voice and her brilliant observations that command respect even if most people will never read the entirety of Middlemarch unless they're a English Graduate student. 

Next, work has been grueling. Working at the grocery store has its ups and downs, and interactions with customers can sometimes be less-than-pleasant, and even with your managers. The late night rush lasts a very long time till midnight sometimes. The customers are impatient and angry and are always willing and ready to start fights beginning with name calling and yelling and sometimes escalating beyond that if they feel so inclined. And boy do they steal. They expect quick service and when they don't get it they sometimes rage. There's a lot of disrespect from customers and managers alike. One common thing I notice is sometimes when customers are in the regular checkout lines they're being rung up, they're ignoring the cashier and they're on their phone yapping. 

In addition, there's the emotional labor within the job. The job is grueling and there's few people that are actually cool with you while you're there. Some of the closest associates and managers I've worked with for years I'm not really cool with them and in fact I think they're shirkers hiding trying to get out of work most of all the time. I usually ignore them and just do what I want. When managers are pretty dumb and not really taking care of business, you find that them doing that allows you to pretty much do what you want, albeit with some caution. 

Remember, most people, including your managers are too dumb and lazy to really pay too much attention, make the most of it. After working in this business for 12 years, you learn that most managers are fake and manipulative so you have to learn how to fake them out in order to do what you want. I had a friend who became a manager and he became another one of those managerial drones that hates his job, maybe his life, maybe himself, but boy does he love being a manager. They ain't reading Middlemarch I'll tell ya that. Another tip for working grueling jobs like this is that if everybody's having a bad day and the work is going to utter shite, and they're all bitching to you, remember you're still having a better day than everybody else so act like it. Act better, be better.

Moving on, the news has been pretty much what I thought it would be. There's really no new news, just more of the same, on a loop, on a 24/7 timescale. I don't care if you're a democrat or a republican, the media and the government has you believing that we're all divided, 'us versus them,' gay versus straight, abortion vs the family, rich versus poor, white versus brown, worker versus ceo, democrat versus republican, this versus that.' I sincerely believe that this is what the government, the media, TV. movies, music, this is what I think they're saying at this impressionable time period in American democracy. 

Just think about the fact that you probably don't even know about BarbenHeimer unless you are a person of a certain kind of persuasion, a certain kind of class, a certain kind of taste. Kind of a random thing to mention but I want to hate on BarbenHeimer because I think it caught the zeitgeist at an important moment in American history what with so much going on with politics. The average American probably saw Barbenheimer but what about the people that didn't? Are they not as American as the rest of them? It's an odd but important question I think for an important reason. Who are the other people? 

Lastly, to wrap things up, we're living in a timescale where pretty much the only way to be safe from most harm in the world, is to have money. Either be born rich, get rich, or work your whole life till you accumulate enough of it because the way the world is going now, the world is turning itself into a money empire, money is the only thing that is important. I think, at this current juncture. I have my hippie element at times, because I'm a musician, but most people would agree with me, that money has pretty much taken over as the most important value of a thing in this world. It's bleak, man. 

Here's a story about money. I have a friend who's rooming with an old friend of ours for $1,000/month but he doesn't want to be there, and he wants to get out, but he can't go back to his parents out of fear or shame, and he can't afford to live on his own, and he prefers not have roommates so he's rooming with our old friend and its not going good. These are the real modern day American problems that the media doesn't talk about. My good pal is stuck with this other guy, supposedly a pal, but he's really an asshole and my guy wants out but he's stuck because the American economic system is setup so that you can't really move out of your parents place unless you have a very good salary at a good job with 40 hours plus benefits or more. That's the reality the media doesn't talk about, instead they usually just force-feed the 'us vs them,' slogan repeatedly. Of course, most conservatives would say my friend isn't doing enough to help himself and that he might need two or three jobs, but at that point, even if he did get his own place, that would be putting an even higher price on life, wouldn't it? 

In conclusion, time to wake up. Only caring about yourself will only get you so far, usually in an organization, but in real life, outside the workplace you have to learn to think smarter and harder about how you can improve the world around you, and think for yourself, rather than listening to the media, your parents, your boss, your friends, your acquaintances. You have to learn to think more about how to correctly justify the differences between right and wrong, and the moral grey. I'm telling you right now, most people don't know how to do this, even some people I know in their 40s and 50s, who you would think would have become smarter by now but it's already too late for them. They've been indoctrinated into their systems of belief, usually the wrong system, you can tell because they're still fucking up even if you don't know or hear about it too often. They're fucking up in the shadows, lol. 

ps, covid might make a comeback this summer in LA

may gloom, june bloom!

Goodbye May gloom, hello June bloom! Looks like even the weather's trying to keep up with my mood swings. What can I say, I'm feeling kind of blue. But this too, shall pass.

Here we are in May. Six months from now we will have a new American President. I think Trump will actually win the election. The court cases and the sensational news about it, every excruciating detail even the stuff about Stormy Daniels, has somehow made Trump even stronger. I think his base are more fired up than ever, and they're around me everyday at the supermarket. Woe is me. Hopefully violence doesn't break out. 

Why I think this. Well, for starters, I think Biden has alienated a lot of his base. People like me, young people, people of culture who vote and think and read and have jobs and families, people who usually always vote democrat, I think Biden has really messed with this set of peoples. However, I think one part of his base that will remain loyal to him no matter what is black women, a large portion of the democratic base. 

I don't want Biden to be President, and I think he's doing a disservice to the world community by funding and sending arms to Israel to use against the war in Gaza, but to be fair, what it really has become, is the Israeli military beating and blowing up Gazan civilians and destroying their infrastructure, now leading to famine. 

I think the outrage and disgust against this war will ultimately result in the loss for the democrats and lead to the takeover of America by the republican party, sponsoring Trump to rule as a fascist despot in the guise of a republican party leader. Almost like some bad nazi won the war movie. That's worst case scenario. And I know you know and think that Americans don't want this. But what if they 0 don't consider swing voters enough 1 don't show up to vote 2 vote for trump 3 end up being okay with being run by a fascist despot, because after all 1 i got mine and 2 those other people don't matter and 3 they should work harder. These are things you've got to think about if you're being realistic. 

Next, the pressing issue of people in today's society and culture. Now, it seems to be that most people out there are not taking care of business. Your parents aren't taking care of business, your managers aren't taking care of business, your friends aren't taking care of business, you have to take care of business yourself. 

So this means you can't just turn on, tune in, and drop out like Timothy Leary. Although many of the older American friends of mine have turned on to this decadent hippie lifestyle. What they'll do is find a way to finance themselves in the easiest way possible, barely work, have a house for them and a girlfriend/wife, and just coast while drinking a lot and perhaps indulging in some occasional recreational drug use. 

Keep in mind I work at a supermarket so I can see and tell you that there alcoholics that come to me to purchase liquor everyday at the same times and they're hardcore alcoholics and it's like a way of life to these people. They come to me to ring it up every time possibly because they think I won't judge them as harshly as the other cashiers, I'm known to be something of a Papa Genu. 

My point; when you have a society, an entire culture wasted by alcohol and recreational drugs like marijuana and cocaine, you have a recipe for mental health disaster. We have not reaped the benefits of the so-called acid generation. In fact, they're a big part of the problem since the 1960s. I'm not saying the conservatives were right, but I'm saying there's been a big problem with the entire liberal agenda, the entire scene, it's all wrong-headed and stupid, and has contributed to moral hazard. 

After all, I am a moral conservative. But one that isn't closeminded to change or adaptation to change. I think change is a big part of the culture, history, society, and government of the United States. I think one of the biggest problems in America today is that we aren't open enough to change. How can you explain the fact that its election 2024 Biden versus Trump yet again. These guys have one foot in the grave and we're giving them a chance to run for president yet again? What does that tell you about us, as a society, as a people, as a culture? 

We live in a society where the culture goes anyway the wind blows. A pop culture, where the average student is weaned to become a consumer of almost any type of goods from any country. When you walk down the street or go to businesses there's more often than not, people making a spectacle of themselves for some reason or other. I see it almost every night at work. These are like happenings, but not the good type of happenings like a concert in the park on an afternoon.

The culture has become debased. We have young people tuned in on video games, tiktok, porn, TV, movies, social media, alcohol, drugs, but not really making the money needed to live a better life or the life they want. They don't contribute to the society in any meaningful way expect putting their hard earned money back into the economy, allowing the invisible hand to do what it will. We have so much of everything that it's literally hurting us to the point where people can not and will not think for themselves. 

Every time you get in an argument with your parents, your managers, your friends, your so-called acquaintances, think about why they were angry and think about the fact that they're not taking care of business. Why should you explain yourself to someone who's completely tuned out and isn't taking care of business? So you see there is a sort of hypocrisy there. 

But wait, there's more. There's still hope yet for you. Through change. Change is the total mass retain. By change you will come to who you are, see things for what they are, and hopefully come to some understanding to develop strategies into which you can transform your world, your environment into whatever you want it to be, leading through your own personal example, but also by going in there and breaking things. The right kind of outside character already knows this, the outsider. But not all of us are outsiders, some of us are children of the wasted acid generation, who didn't have a clue and still don't, especially now that they're getting older. 

The last part here is the most important. You have to learn to think for yourself. Question everything, question even what I have written here, question yourself, question your own thoughts and ideas, but keep a reality principal, make sure you understand and know what is real and what is not, learn to become smarter so you can more easily define and compare good and evil. I know this is basic but you would be surprised how many people don't know this because they think doctors, lawyers, parents, wives, girlfriends, or therapists will help them and somehow they'll 'figure it all out.' 

Of course, today, anyone with an iq above 28 is a threat to society and is automatically labeled an outsider, even if he knows it or not. Why? Drugs and alcoholism has taken over critical thinking in the younger classes and disillusionment and powerlessness have overtaken the older generations to the point where most of them are tuned out to the pop culture world and live in a small capsule. 

Is this the end of civilization part III? 

flowers and sunshine!

Greetings, cosmic playground, 

How goes the cosmic dance in your corner of the infinitesimal universe?

Life has been a delightful romp through the garden of existence, with just the right amount of sunshine and whimsy. I'm working, happy, and healthy. I've been reading a lot, per usual, perhaps even more these last two years, you can check out my goodreads account [here] if you're so inclined. Right now I'm reading The Idiot by Dostoevsky. I'm still working a steady schedule as a cashier at the local market. I go out everyday to get exercise. I've stopped playing video games as often and instead got more into ai art. I go out to the bar every now and then in an attempt to be more social. I'm a man on a mission, it seems.

Looks like Mother Nature decided to fast-forward to summer mode, giving us a taste of July in April!

I listen to a lot of music still, but become even more specialized, now, I listen to a lot of opera, mostly old ones. My favorite is Mozart's Magic Flute and Cosi Fan Tutti, but lately I've been on a Vivaldi binge, Vivaldi wrote some 50-60 operas, whereas Mozart, genius as he was, only wrote about 22. Frank Zappa: All the good music has been done by the people in wigs. But I also listen to a lot of jazz, I'm particularly fond of Kind of Blue and Out To Lunch mixed in with A Love Supreme, those are die-hard g0-to albums for me daily.

I think a lot like a philosopher. About life in America, at this current time-period or level, about the person I am/was/created/now, and there's a lot there to think about. But just as Voltaire said, "a man can very rarely rise above the ideas of his time." We live in a crossroads of history. They just passed a full-scale abortion ban in Arizona, bringing a state in the United States back to the 1800s. Something similar might happen in Wisconsin soon according to the news.

We find ourselves navigating the curious currents of an eccentric epoch. The cult of personality [Trump] has infected a large portion of Americans. As Huxley said, "The propagandist's purpose is to make one set of people forget that certain other sets of people are human." We see this time and time again, from the MAGA crowd. After all, lest we forget, the first thing Trump did when he was in office was to instate a Muslim ban in the United States like a typical fear-monger. 

The fear of a Trump ascendency back to the Presidential Office is startlingly scary. Not just for democrats like Biden, or women who want reproductive rights, or the little guy struggling to provide for his family, or single parent moms trying to feed their little ones. It's scary for the entire statehood of our country and/or the world. 

The decisions made during these voting processes end up lasting 30 years or more in some cases. Consider the fact that these conservative Supreme Court judges are now more than ever willing to pass abortion bans now all of a sudden, only, that it isn't all of a sudden, but a directed, planned, and successful attack by the Right in an attempt for more control, in this case, literally over women's bodies. The Arizona abortion ban was passed yesterday but it's been in the works forever. 

There's this sort of intergenerational politics that we young people don't quite understand because we're distracted by girlfriends, wives, our kids, jobs, and making money to survive to provide for ourselves and loved ones. Behind the scenes, these plans have been made sometimes without our even being involved, because the seeds were planted in the voting processes 30 years ago or more. What does that mean? It is my opinion, that certain political ideas and actions were originally planted decades maybe even a 100 years before we came along and even voted.

The Roman Empire only lasted 1,000 years. The Egyptian Empire lasted 3,000 years. The American Empire is only 247 years old. Do we really think we could be better than the rest of the world forever? There's a certain bit of apathy as regards to this sort of stuff, politics in general, as well as within the people in the society. Nowadays when you try to get advice from the internet or in YouTube videos, people just post things about how negative everything is, and somehow this fine advice is supposed to help you on your way in this topsy-turvy universe. I see that oftentimes bad ideas and bad advice usually come from young people or university people that are marketing their brand to an unsuspecting audience. 

Have you noticed how now, more than ever, things have become strictly commercial? It's irritatingly comical in that fact. The invisible hand moves the economy, but in most cases, people are spending much more than they should have to, especially when it comes to rent, gas for their car, food, childcare, and schooling, be it private school, public school, and college. 

In a sense, the world changes once you wake up to the actual realisation of a commercial state. Your spending habits sort of define what kind of person you are, what your politics are, your job, your hobbies, your likes, dislikes, what sorts of races of people you hangout with even or talk to, the studies done by companies about what you're buying daily, monthly, yearly, tell them more about you than perhaps even FBI and NSA findings about you. 

I believe it's all about pumping more and more money into the economy at all times, even at times when people should be saving more and buying and spending less. But I'm probably more of a classical liberal on this subject than I lead on. I'm no marxist but I do believe that more people take advantage of the system in capitalism, now, more than ever. Technically capitalism is good, right? But you see the ramifications of capitalism going out of control, like today, where a burger and fries at McDonalds is $13 because they're paying the burger flipper $20 even though they pay people less than that at a lot of jobs here. 

Oftentimes, just talking about things can straighten things and even people out. Everything that you're going through, somebody else has already gone through it. Someone you know knows what you're going through because they've already done it themselves, or perhaps they're going through it at the same time as you? Likewise, jotting down your ideas and thinking in the form of writing sort of clears out a lot of ideas that you've been thinking about daily and perhaps monthly as well. 

It's like philosophy, life. But philosophy is not an idea. Philosophy is action. 

Likewise, its not enough to be a smart guy, or a guy with good virtues, who performs good acts throughout the world. A man must also have the right character. Especially in these dark times. If you believe what you hear, the world is a dark place; women/men will cheat on you, fathers will leave their children to single parent moms, Trump might win and smite all his enemies somehow, the economy is doing great and people have jobs but they're all terrible jobs like ubereats, grubhub, lyft, uber, so-called 'gig economy' work, corporate retail has become more machine-like and un-human to a startlingly high degree, Americans keep consuming more and more, they emit the most greenhouse gases into the atmosphere because they all want to drive around everywhere, harming the planet, causing more natural disasters, the propaganda doesn't look good online, so where do you go, what do you do?

The fact that you simply asked says more about you than the question itself. But again, a man hardly ever rises above the ideas of his time. If you predicted that you would be here doing this at this time but 10-15 years ago, you are either a god or a wild beast.

It would be okay to be both. 

[ps covid is still lingering, image ai generated] 

New Year, New Me, [Not Really]

Hello Universe, 

How is it going out there in the free world? It's a new year, happy 2024! It's time for all those happy go lucky social media posts where people make their new years resolutions, like to get a better body and become more healthy and sexy and find their dream spouse, and get a lotta money, amiright? I'd like to jot down some thoughts on what's been happening with me, my personal activities, working in retail, and more. 

First, I moved into a new house recently. It was a hard move that was strenuous but now that it's done I can finally relax. At the end of the month I took time off from work just to get settled into the new place and unbox everything. The new house is in a better location to get around on foot or on the bus if needed. I've been waking up earlier, going out to lunches at nearby establishments, going to the library, and more. I'm still working at the grocery store and it's going well. Since the holidays are over, things have slowed down there, for now. Covid still lingers there from time to time, so I've still been wearing my facemask.  

I kept up playing piano and drums. Now, I'm finally making good progress on piano, at least trying to move from beginner to something like intermediate, although it will take a while. My dad decided to keep our late step-mom Maureen's Yamaha grand piano, so I've been playing that piano. Today, I recorded an eight minute grand piano solo, [which you can hear piano solo no. 1] With the piano, I'm trying to focus on playing jazz chords and improvising. I practice everyday, and actually have preferred practicing piano as of late, because my guitars and amp are all backed away and it's easier to just play the grand piano for now. 

Likewise, I've been keeping up with drums. I go to guitar center and just play the drums there. You can hear my most recent drum playing here.

Second, I'm still reading a lot and doing a lot of AI art. You can check out my Instagram page here. The picture featured at the top of this page is an AI art creation. At the end of last year I read a lot of science fiction novels by Iain M. Banks, who died early in his 50s. Terrific writer, but he writes terribly long science fiction space opera, albeit it's amazing writing and great space opera, but the some seven books I read of his were definitely time consuming and not easy reads. Space opera for the literati. Right now all my books are packed away so I just bought for a dollar, a paperbacks editions of Crime and Punishment by Dostoyevsky and Charlotte Bronte's Jane Eyre. I'm keeping up with the western canon, now I've read about 300 works. But I feel like I've barely scraped the surface in terms of what can be learned within knowledge, within the realm of imagination, and the curiosity of man himself. 

At the end of last year, I kind of went into deep hibernation bear mode. The bear knows when to sleep but the bobcat knows when its time to hunt. I find getting up earlier and going out more has been better for me, being productive keeps me energetic, and I'm liking the atmosphere of the new house better and more easily able to adapt to this. Sometimes on Mondays I go to this open blues jam at the bar, and I sit in and play guitar. I go out to dinners with family on my days off work. 

Lastly, I've found that life is made up of thoughts, actions, and plans for the future. There's a lot to do. Work is still time consuming, but with a schedule for the day, the week, the month, the next three months, the next six months, the next year, things are much more manageable within a smaller timeline and with hard goals split and separated into smaller and more manageable goals.

I want to get better at piano and be able to play jazz standards on it, keep reading, write more short stories and perhaps a novel [I actually have written a novel, but nobody's seen it], keep blogging about everything, and keep up with my guitar and drums too. Work has been good, the hard work keeps me awake. 

That's it for now, see you later, space cats. 

In sylvan realms where twilight's whispers creep, The bear, a sagacious entity, seeks a somber keep. As autumnal regalia, the leaves cascade, He intuits the impending winter's serenade.

With fur of resplendent aureate hue, He embarks on a quest for a snug haven's view. A sanctuary, where crystalline brooks freeze, In dreams of honeyed combs and berries with ease.

Yet by the babbling stream, where moonbeams wink, The bobcat prowls, a phantom feline in sync. His eyes, aglint with nocturnal savoir-faire, In stealth, he traverses the tapestry of air.

For as the bear in dormant repose lies, The bobcat, vigilant, neath the celestial ties, Stalks in the silent hours of night's embrace, A sovereign of shadows, embodying grace.

In nature's ballet, a harmonious ballet, The bear succumbs to rest, the bobcat to ballet. One cradles dreams of vernal rebirth, The other, a custodian, prowls the moonlit earth. [AI generated]